[Copypasta] I sexually Identify as a Lamborghini

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of ＤＲＩＶing ＵＰ ＨＥＲＥ ＩＮ ＴＨＥ ＨＯＬＬＹＷＯＯＤ ＨＩＬＬＳ. People say to me that a person being a ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ is Impossible and I’m ＭＡＴＥＲＩＡＬＩＳＴＩＣ but I don’t care, I’m this ＮＥＷ ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ ＨＥＲＥ. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 ＮＥＷ bookshelves and ２０００ ｎｅｗ ｂｏｏｋｓ on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “ＮＥＷ ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ ＨＥＲＥ” and respect my right to ＤＲＩＶＥ ＵＰ ＨＥＲＥ ＩＮ ＴＨＥ ＨＯＬＬＹＷＯＯＤ ＨＩＬＬＳ. If you can’t accept me you’re a ＬＡＭＢＯphobe and need to check your ＧＮＡＷＬＩＤＧＥ. Thank you, and I'll see you on my website.
twitch chat
October 2016

I sexually Identify as

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I sexually Identify as your mom

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as your mom. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of cooking for your father and you and fuck your father and make you more sisters. People say to me that a person being your mom is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. im gonna marry your father. From now on I want you guys to call me " Mommy" and respect my right to cook food and fuck your father. If you can't accept me you're a mommyphobic and need to check if your mom is still alive. Thank you for being so understanding
twitch chat
September 2019

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as a Bastion

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a Bastion. Ever since I was a transistor I dreamed of being nanoboosted and firing cannonballs on the disgusting enemy team. People tell me that being a Siege Automaton is impossible but I don't care, I'm overpowered. I’m having a plastic surgeon install treads, a gattling gun and a nanoboost on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me BOOSTED and respect my right to take 35% less damage 100% of the time. If not, you're an omnic-phobe and need to check your human privileges
twitch chat
March 2017

Overwatch

I sexually Identify as

I sexually idenfity as VapeNation

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as VapeNation . Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being VapeNation is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me “Lit” and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you can’t accept me you’re a vapiphobe and need to check your VapeNation privileges
twitch chat
March 2016

VapeNation

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

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