[Copypasta] I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017
I used to be a real ad
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August 2018

Gaben

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣔⢤⣄⡀⠄⡄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿ ⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣨⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣦⣤⣀⣿⣷⡐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⢚⣿ ⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣻⣄⣤⣮⡝⣿ ⣿⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠘⣿⡗⡕⣋⢉⣩⣽⣬⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣝⣻⣷⣿ ⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠠⢀⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠰⣶⡗⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣌⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠱⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠨⡿⠿⠿⣿⣟⣿⣯⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⢷⣦⠄⠄⠐⢶⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡄⠄⠄⠉⠄⠄⠄⢉⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄ ⣿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄
ascii art
December 2018

Zeus hates Kripp's casualness

twitchquotes: Hᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Zᴇᴜs, Gᴏᴅ ᴏғ Oʟʏᴍᴘᴜs. I ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʙᴇᴇɴ ɪɴғᴏʀᴍᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴍʏ sᴇʀᴠᴀɴᴛs ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴅɪsɢʀᴀᴄɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʜᴏʟʏ ʟᴀɴᴅ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟɴᴇss. Yᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ two ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴅᴀʏs ᴛᴏ sᴜᴍᴍᴏɴ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴀʀᴅᴄᴏʀᴇ ʀᴏᴏᴛs ᴏʀ ᴇʟsᴇ I'ᴍ ɢᴏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴀɴɴɪʜɪʟᴀᴛᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴀɴᴀᴅɪᴀɴ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍʏ +25% ᴅᴍɢ ᴛᴏ ʟɪɢʜᴛɴɪɴɢ sᴋɪʟʟ.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday

Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
December 2020

Donald of the House Trump

twitchquotes: SMOrc In the name of Donald of the House Trump SMOrc , First of his name, rightful President of the States. Lord of the 2 political parties, SMOrc Protector of the Border. I trumpW sentence you to exile. SMOrc
twitch chat
August 2015
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