[Copypasta] I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017
I used to be a real ad
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Luigi's donger

twitchquotes: In 2018 Nintendo released official marketing art that featured Luigi in Mario Tennis, fans were able to figure out the length of Luigi’s penis by measuring the tennis racket compared to luigi’s bulge in the image. Since Tennis rackets are 28 inches long in real life, by measuring the pixels we were able to mathematically deduce that Luigi’s penis is 3.7 inches flacid.
twitch chat
December 2020

Minecraft creeper head v2

βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…β¬›β¬›βœ…βœ…βœ… βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…βœ…
ascii art
August 2021

Minecraft

Response to the Vaporeon copypasta (Vaporeons are dangerous)

Hey guys did you know that in terms of water Pokemon inland, Vaporeon would be very capable of hunting grown humans? Their bodies being the size of a medium dog and weight are just enough to pounce on a man and throw him to the ground. Their bulky stats would allow them to shrug off and outlast any attempts by the human to fight them off, and that's not getting even into moves like Hydro Pump and Scald. But that's not all these water dogs have up their sleeves. Their bodies being so similar to water not only lets them hide in bodies of water and become nearly invisible to catch prey off guard, but allows them to enter the body through almost any orifice. Things do not get any better once a Vaporeon is inside of you. If asphyxiation doesn't kill you, the internal bleeding and displacement of internal organs certainly will. In addition, they are able to learn Charm, allowing them to take advantage of certain... desires humans may have and create even more opportunities to go in for the kill. But wait, there's more. Since Vaporeon is an omnivore, its cells would need to be able to digest proteins, such as those in meat. This only opens even more possibilities as to what these creatures are capable of.
March 2022

Pokemon

Overconfidence is a slow and insidious killer

twitchquotes: ( Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°) OVERCONFIDENCE IS A SLOW AND INSIDIOUS KILLER ( Ν Β° ΝŸΚ– Ν‘Β°)
twitch chat
July 2015

Classic

Biden at a CNN townhall with Don Lemon

Biden: Yo- uh, y-you, y-you got the vaccination? Don Lemon: Yeah. Biden: A-Are you... Are you okay? I mean, you seem... no, it works, or you, you know, or, or, or, or the mom and dad, or or, or, or, or the neighbor, or when you... go to church, or when you’re β€” n-no, I-I-I-I really mean it, there... are trusted interlocutors. Think of the people, if-if your kid wanted to find out whether or not there were β€” there’s a man on the moon, or, or whatever, you know, something, or, you know, whether those aliens are here or not. You know, who are the people they talk to beyond the kids who love talking about it?
July 2021
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