[Copypasta] Flex Tape

twitchquotes: To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
twitch chat
August 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Porn scene fanfic

Cashier was at home until someone came to the door. He opened the door and a very cute girl selling girl scout cookies was there. "Do you want any cookies sir?", she asked him. Cashier asked, "is there any other way I could pay?" THEY FUCK
July 2022

Kripp's MALDHAWK

twitchquotes: Late last year, we were on an expedition to find the rarest hairstyle of them all.. the "MALDHAWK" A combination of MALD and a hawk nest, it combines the fluidity of middle aged male pattern baldness to a contrast of dead rats. Much to our chagrin, we found it April 13th, 2020, on a morose Canadian gypsy's stream. He had over 10k viewers at the time of writing this
twitch chat
April 2020
Kripp

TSM aka "Truly Somewhat Mediocre"

TSM aka "Truly Somewhat Mediocre" is a North American team that consistently underperforms in all international tournaments. It is specifically known for having a weak early, mid, and late-game.
February 2022

League of Legends

IM DELETING YOU, DADDY!

IM DELETING YOU, DADDY!πŸ˜­πŸ‘‹ β–ˆβ–ˆ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 10% complete..... β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 35% complete.... β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 60% complete.... β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ] 99% complete..... 🚫ERROR!🚫 πŸ’―TrueπŸ’― Daddies are irreplaceable πŸ’–I could never delete you Daddy!πŸ’– Send this to ten other πŸ‘ͺDaddiesπŸ‘ͺ who give you πŸ’¦cummiesπŸ’¦ Or never get called ☁️squishy☁️ again❌❌😬😬❌❌ If you get 0 Back: no cummies for you πŸš«πŸš«πŸ‘Ώ 3 back: you're squishyβ˜οΈπŸ’¦ 5 back: you're daddy's kittenπŸ˜½πŸ‘ΌπŸ’¦ 10+ back: Daddy
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

Elundus Core

twitchquotes: The Elundus Core was a 6.2-kilogram (14 lb) subcritical mass of a previously undiscovered isotope of plutonium measuring 89 millimeters and was previously held in Felix "xQc" Lengyel's basement. It now lives in the depths of yellowstone waiting to explode
twitch chat
May 2019
xQcOW
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