[Copypasta] Flex Tape

twitchquotes: To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
twitch chat
August 2018
I used to be a real ad
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This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022

Halloween Mercy

twitchquotes: 😍Guys😍, I’m 😲shaking😲. I’m fucking😲 shaking😲. I never wanted to 👉👌🍆🍑breed 🍑🍆👉👌with anyone more than I want to with 🎃👻Halloween 👻✝️Mercy.✝️🎃️ That 💯perfect,💯 ⏳curvy ⏳😍body.😍 Those 😍bountiful😍 🍈breasts🍈. The 👪child 👪bearing😍 hips😍 of a 🖼️💐literal goddess💐🖼️. It honestly fucking 😳😳hurts😳😳 knowing that I’ll never❤👅💋mate ❤👅💋with her, ⬆pass⬆ my 👖genes👖 through her, and have her 👑birth👑 a set of 👪💯perfect offspring.💯👪 I’d do fucking💰💰💰 ANYTHING 💰💰
twitch chat
June 2017

Emoji Pasta

Overwatch

I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday

twitchquotes: I saw Kripp at the tavern yesterday. I told him it would be cool to see him play arena again. He said, “Why, so you can snipe me at 8 wins?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I thought he was going for a brofist, so I extended my hand only to have it slapped away in disgust. Later on I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen murlocs in his hands without paying.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Mitochondrion is a double membrane-bound organelle

twitchquotes: The mitochondrion (plural mitochondria) is a double membrane-bound organelle found in all eukaryotic organisms. Some cells in some multicellular organisms may however lack them (for example, mature mammalian red blood cells). A number of unicellular organisms, such as microsporidia, parabasalids, and diplomonads, have also reduced or transformed their mitochondria into other structures. To date, only one eukaryote, Monocercomonoides, is known to have completely lost its mitochondria.
twitch chat
July 2017

Jeff Bezos could give every person 1 BILLION dollars

Jeff Bezos has 121 BILLION dollars. The population of earth is 7 billion people. He could give every person 1 BILLION dollars and end poverty, and he would still have 114 billion dollars left over but he wond do it. This is what capitalist greed looks like!
October 2020
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