[Copypasta] Kappa dab

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Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter?

Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter? I’ve never heard that joke before, but it’s so genius! You sir, or madame, or helicopter, are the absolute most hilarious and original person I have ever seen in my entire life. Move over, Jerry Seinfeld. Get lost, Brian Regan. Out of the way, Family Guy Funny Moments Compilation #53. There’s a new funniest man in town. Holy shit, I just can’t get over this joke. I’m giggling and guffawing harder than ever before. You should win an Oscar and an Emmy and a Grammy and a Nickelodeon Kid’s Choice Award. Attack helicopter gender! Wow! So funny! Take that, liberals! Haha. Every night since I was born I have looked up to the plastic glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling and wondered, “I hope one day I can be as funny as the attack helicopter gender guy.” I will tell my children, and my children’s children, all about the absolute hilarity that went down just now. You just broke the Guinness World Record for funniest and most original jokester on the planet. I’m fucking simultaneously shitting and cumming because this joke is just so funny. Holy shit. That was an amazing joke, my guy. I’m gonna make a subreddit dedicated entirely to this one joke. It’s gonna get thousands of members! History books will forever remember the time you said, “I identify as an attack helicopter.” It’ll go right there in the important quote book, right between Patrick Henry and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I just can’t believe I was here to witness such grandeur. I was here! I think I’m going to make a whole religion based on worshipping you, my glorious and hilarious attack helicopter God. This is just so funny I can’t believe it! Hahahahahahahahahaha! I think I’m going to go to the hospital and fucking die from laughing to hard, but that’s okay! This is even funnier than that guy who said he identified as a toaster! Can you believe it? I never thought that very different joke could be topped, but here we are! Did I mention how funny and original that joke was? Ah, well done, sir, or madame, or helicopter. This is an experience I won’t forget any time soon. Ha. Haha. Ha. Lol. Lmao. Haha. Jajaja. Lmfao. Rofl, rotfl, ha.
June 2021

The One Who Brings Salt

twitchquotes: Tells the legend that a long time ago all sea's water was fresh. But one tragic day a baby came out of the sea and was found by a group of african sea men. One week later, after the little baby saw the sea men play Hearth of Stone all the water turned salty. So they named him Kripp, which in Afrikaans means The One Who Brings Salt
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January 2015
Kripp

Fortnite default dance 3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⠶⠀⠀⣀⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣀⣶⣤⣤⠿⠶⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣉⣿⣿ ⠿⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⣤⣿⣿⣿⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣛⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⠿⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⠿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠛⠀⠀⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⠤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

Hydra smile

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠻⠿⠿⠋⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠙⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⣉⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠒⠄⡟⠍⢻⣿⣿⠍⠛⠄⠙⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠢⠄⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣾⠄⣤⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⠻⣷⣌⣉⣉⣴⠿⣀⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⢰⣿⣿⣿⡏⢰⡟⣡⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡀⣭⣭⣭⣥⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣧⠘⣿⣿⣿⣷⠘⠁⡟⠏⢻⣿⡟⠍⢹⡇⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣆⢻⠿⢋⣉⣤⡀⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣾⡇⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣇⠻⣧⣝⣛⣛⣭⡿⠃⣩⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣍⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣶⣌⢉⣉⣉⣥⠞⢸⡿⠻⣿⣿⡿⠛⢿⠄⠿ ⣿⣿⠇⣸⣿⣿⣿⡄⢹⣿⠆⠙⣉⣡⣀⢸⣧⣠⣾⣿⣷⣤⣼⠄⣀ ⡿⠋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢈⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣟⠻⠿⠟⣻⣿⢸⣿ ⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣬⡙⠿⠿⠿⣋⣵⣾⣿
May 2019

I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times

FUCK YOU. I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times. GET FUCKING ORIGINAL. Jesus fucking christ. Stop saying the same fucking thing over and over and over again. Just because you don't agree with me DOES NOT HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH PARTIES. What the fuck. Do you fucking fart at parties or something? If so I don't want to go to your shitty-ass parties in the first place. I'll stick to my wine and cheese dinners, you know, REAL FUCKING PARTIES. I downvoted you because not one thing you said was original. You're just a robot programmed to say these phrases over and over again to feel connected to 1s and 0s on the internet. You've never been to a party. That's why you say those things. WELL I'M FUCKING tired. of it. I'm tired. Say that to me one more fucking time and I will find you. I'm taking a stand. I am so sick of the stupid "parties" comeback. It's not fun. It's not clever. It's really fucking hurtful. Thanks a lot, dick. So what if you don't like what I said. Is that any reason to dismiss my entire comment and quote a little comeback. What's next, you're going to explain to me with crayons or call out my bullshit by how I overcomplicating things? If I see one more fucking party comment, I'm going to lose it. I'm going off the fucking chain and fucking report all you motherfuckers who think it's funny to comment about being fun at parties. Try me. I will do it. I will go STRAIGHT TO THE FUCKING TOP and then I'll be the one laughing while you beg for my mercy. Then you know what I'll say while you come to me crying and begging to die so you can stop the agony? I'll say "You must be fun at parties." So yeah, If you must know, I am pretty fun at parties. Not that you'll ever find out, dick.
August 2021
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