[Copypasta] Kappa dab

I used to be a real ad
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Rasputin

⡯⣫⢯⡫⣏⢯⢯⢯⢯⢯⣟⡿⠛⠉⠁⠐⣿⢿⣟⡿⣽⣻⣽⣟⣿⢿⣿⣿⣟⡿⣿⢽⣻⢽⡯⣟⡽⣯⣻⢽⢯⣻⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽⢽ ⡯⣺⣕⢯⢾⢽⢽⡽⣿⠛⠁⠄⢀⢀⠄⢅⢴⣿⢾⣽⣯⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠠⠄⠈⠙⠿⣯⢿⣳⡯⣯⢟⡾⡽⡽⡽⡽⡽⡽⡽⣽ ⡯⣺⢮⢯⡳⡯⡷⡿⠃⢀⢔⢈⠐⠨⠨⢂⠩⣽⣿⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠐⡐⡔⠄⠄⢀⠄⢈⠙⢯⣿⡽⣯⢯⢿⡽⣽⢽⢽⢽⢽⣽ ⣟⢮⡻⡮⡯⡿⣿⠄⠌⠂⠂⢀⠂⡄⢄⣔⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⢄⠠⣢⡖⠝⡂⢀⠄⠂⢀⠂⡂⠸⣿⣟⣿⢽⡽⣽⢽⢯⣟⣗⣿ ⣗⢯⢯⢯⣟⣽⡿⢀⠆⢀⠠⣐⠈⠎⠫⢈⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⢀⠢⡝⡚⠁⠄⠄⠄⢂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠡⠘⢿⣻⣽⢯⣗⣟⣗⣗⡷⣽ ⡯⣫⡯⣗⡷⣿⡇⠄⢀⢀⠢⣣⢿⡿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢀⣿⡆⠄⠄⠐⢈⠐⠩⠂⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠔⠰⡠⠂⢈⠠⠈⣻⣿⣟⣷⣫⢾⣺⢽⣺ ⣯⡳⡯⣗⣟⡿⠄⢀⢔⣼⣾⡏⢢⢻⣽⣿⠄⠄⢈⣿⣧⠄⠄⣁⣠⣠⣴⣼⣿⣿⣿⣾⣦⣤⣁⠁⠂⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣷⣻⡽⣞⡯⣿ ⣗⢯⣻⡽⣾⡁⠄⣲⣵⣿⣿⢇⢱⠐⠐⠅⠃⠄⠐⢽⣿⡯⡸⣷⣿⣟⣾⡿⣿⣟⣿⢿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⡾⣯⣗⡯⣿ ⣯⢯⢷⣻⡿⠄⠄⡿⣿⢿⣽⣳⡝⡼⡸⡵⠄⠄⠤⣔⣽⢇⢗⡯⣷⣿⣷⡿⣟⡷⡽⡽⡽⣯⣿⣽⢿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣷⣗⡯⣿ ⡯⣯⢿⣽⡇⠄⢔⣽⣿⣿⡿⣟⣜⢮⣻⣽⣷⣝⣿⣿⣿⠸⡽⣽⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣳⣻⢽⡿⡿⡻⣽⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣻⡾⣽⣻ ⣯⢷⣻⣽⠄⢌⣮⣿⣾⢿⣿⣗⡵⣳⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⢐⠠⠑⠙⠝⠺⢫⣿⣽⠨⠃⠁⢀⣀⠁⠑⢯⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⢯⡷⣿ ⣿⣽⢯⡏⠄⠌⡞⣿⢺⣽⣿⡷⣟⡮⣿⢿⣽⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠢⡑⠜⡎⡆⢀⣿⣿⢿⡻⡑⢕⡺⣿⣫⣞⣾⣿⣿⠐⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⡯⣯⣿ ⣿⣾⠟⠄⢀⢑⢬⣇⡫⣿⣿⣿⣽⣾⣽⢿⣿⡿⠁⠠⢡⢱⠰⡠⡑⠜⢐⢐⣽⣿⣿⣷⣧⢧⣻⣾⣯⣿⣿⣿⡟⠠⠄⠄⠄⢸⢿⣽⢷⣿ ⠟⣜⢄⢰⢨⠪⡕⡦⣏⢿⢽⡽⡷⣗⢯⠛⠁⠄⠄⠐⠈⡢⢑⠔⠌⠂⢐⢵⣿⣿⣿⡷⣿⡿⣷⢷⣿⣽⣿⡿⠁⡀⡂⣀⠄⣼⣿⣻⣽⣻ ⡕⣺⡢⡣⣕⣿⣜⣮⣶⣷⣟⣿⣺⣽⣁⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠂⠠⢑⠨⡈⢀⠠⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣳⡯⣻⢿⣻⣿⣿⠍⠂⠂⡣⣿⣿⡿⣾⣻⣺⣽ ⡧⣸⣝⣷⣻⣿⢿⣿⣿⢿⣿⡷⣿⣿⣿⣿⠹⡊⠄⠄⠐⢈⢐⠈⠄⠂⠄⠙⡻⡿⣯⡾⣿⣿⡿⣝⢿⣿⡇⠐⠄⠄⠂⣚⡺⣽⣽⢾⣻⣾ ⣿⢸⣟⣮⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡍⣿⣿⣿⣯⢋⢂⠄⠈⡀⠄⠠⠄⢂⠐⡔⡸⢸⠂⠎⡌⡆⢔⢩⠠⠈⡻⢅⠁⠄⠄⠈⣔⢽⣳⡽⣽⣗⣿ ⢿⣸⣿⣿⣷⣷⣽⣿⣾⣻⣪⠇⢸⣿⣿⣿⢪⡀⠄⠄⠠⠄⡀⠐⡀⠄⠄⢠⢢⢐⡠⣂⢮⡮⠂⢕⠣⠡⡁⠄⡀⠄⠄⠆⣅⣷⣻⣳⣯⣿ ⠈⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣯⠟⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣯⣗⠅⠄⢀⠐⢀⠄⡁⢀⠂⠍⡆⣖⢐⢐⣜⣞⣮⡳⠁⠨⠈⠌⡀⠄⠠⠈⣊⢮⣞⣾⣳⢷⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠟⠋⠄⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡺⠁⠠⠄⠐⢀⠁⠄⠄⠅⠣⡹⡳⢟⢿⢿⢿⢷⠐⠈⢀⠄⡂⠄⠠⠄⠠⠸⣿⣳⣷⣟⣯⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⡀⠄⣼⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠈⠉⠄⡀⠂⡈⠔⠄⠂⢂⠁⠅⢁⢎⠄⠱⡁⡁⠈⡀⠄⠐⠄⠄⠄⠐⡠⢈⠠⠁⠄⢉⠛⢿⣿⣿
January 2021

You will never be an anime girl

You will never be an anime girl. You have no ancestry, you have no weebship, you have no skills that would make neon Tokyo ever want you. You are a shut-in self-hating nerdy man twisted by delusions of mythical Katana superiority and exposure to media folded over 3000 times into a disgusting mockery of metalworkings perfection. All 'validation' you get from other people in this position couldn't be worse in making you believe that spending years of your life learning a the globally useless talents of Uwudo and Iya-giri to a 中二 level was a worthwhile 使い方 of お前's time, but one can't expect that an individual as 羞耻 as テメ will ever know the value of the 仲間 you threw away in doing that. Actual Sasukes are すごい キモい by you. Thousands of years of 自然進化 have allowed 侍 to identify 偽物語 from mannerisms and 言語力 alone. Even if your written text of self-hatred and attention begging akin to a 野良犬 somehow passes as normal (しないよ、ど阿呆), any Soul Eater person will immediately 両断 all 迷い when they 聞く the 声 and 広島-ben of someone who is not only a basic 下忍 at best, but worth no more than ゴミカス in skills, accomplishments, and no ワイフ yes フレンド. You will never be 幸せおちゃめ機能。 You wrench out a 偽笑い and www草 to yourself believing that watching a content creator that you understand 20% of at best is somehow superior than watching your own 船長, as you project your disgusting traits onto your 委員長. However, deep inside you feel the 不安 creeping up like a 桜, ready to crush you under the バスト2三一 Zz ガンダム, and you know that. You know that all you do now is have an entirely new リスナー in which to be 無視, and not even the exotic trait of being 海外ニッキ makes up for just how uninteresting of a 無言赤スパ you are. Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope, tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold はあちゃま. Your ママ will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable 恥ざらし and ゴミカス死ね. They’ll bury you with a 妖怪 marked with your 領域展開, and every 上弦の鬼 for the rest of eternity will know a 黒船 is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a ギルザレン that is 語り部幽霊. This is your 運命. This is what you chose. There is no turning back. 憎い yourself and 謝れ for being リア充 to some Virtual entity that exists only in your mind while actual people put in effort to learn English for the valid reason of it being the global language.
April 2021

Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 2

So yesterday at lunch, I was about to eat with my friends from band when I realized that there was an empty seat at a table with some of the popular kids. I decided to take advantage of this opportunity to troll them, and perhaps befriend some of them. I sat at their table, and right as I sat down, I noticed that one of the kids (who happened to be black) was sitting above a vent. I yelled "Black is sus! He's on top of a vent!!" Everyone at the table looked up at me, but no one laughed (they probably didn't get the reference). I decided that I would try to get them to be familiar with it, so I asked "Do to guys wanna play some Among Us???" They were all dead silent (honestly they just didn't know how fun of a game it was). I slapped the middle of our table (to mimick the "emergency meeting" feature in Among Us), and I screamed "EMERGENCY MEETING!!!" Again, none of them laughed. One of them looked at me and said "Can you please sit somewhere else?" At this point, I realized that I had to make them laugh quickly, or I would blow my chance with them. I made the widest grin I could possibly make (Trying to mimick the "When the imposter is sus" meme) and I said "When the impoter is sus". I then tried to make a face that resembled the "Flushed" emoji (as part of the meme). However, I don't think any of them understood the reference. I then pulled up the among us theme song on Youtube and played it on full blast. At this point, everyone at my table was asking for me to leave, and their friend came back, who regularly sat in the chair I was sitting in. I went back to sit with my friends from band. However, I will forever remember the time I trolled ALL of the popular kids in my grade.
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

This scallywag's deck be kookoo bananas!

twitchquotes: ୧༼ಠ益▀ ༽୨ “This scallywag's deck be kookoo bananas!” ☑ “Me deck can nae scourge tis deck!” ☑ “This swab needed precisely them cards to send me deck to Davey Jones’ locker.” ☑ “He top-pillaged th' only card on the high seas that could best me.” ☑ “Thar was naught I could do.” ☑ “I weathered that perfectly” ☑ ୧༼ಠ益▀ ༽୨
twitch chat
January 2015

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Scary Reddit alien

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡯⠄⢀⣄⣤⣀⡀⠄⢼⣿⣿⡄⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠂⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠉⠙⠉⠄⣠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠋⠄⠘⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠛⠛⠉⢀⣀⣤⣤⣦⣶⣶⣶⣶⣴⣤⣤⣀⡀⠉⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠻⣿ ⡏⠄⣴⣾⠓⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠹⣿⣦⠄⠈ ⡇⠐⢿⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠫⠩⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠍⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠈⡿⠃⠄ ⣿⡄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⣅⣵⣔⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣢⣑⣐⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢠⣾ ⣿⡇⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⢿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⠄⠝⣞⠯⣟⡿⣼⠫⡶⠸⠖⠃⠛⠢⠆⠖⢭⢫⣾⣻⣝⢷⠛⠄⢠⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⡀⠈⠫⡫⡟⣿⡂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣯⣟⢗⠝⠁⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠈⢫⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢸⣿⡳⠅⠁⣀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠓⣿⡤⡘⠰⠰⢘⣠⣿⠇⠅⠠⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⢀⠑⠝⢽⣙⣘⠵⠏⠃⡀⢡⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
April 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing