twitchquotes:
why do they call it xbox 360? because when you see it you turn 360 degrees and walk away π π π― π₯
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More Copypastas
I fell asleep masturbating with the curtains open and porn playing
I thought it would be nice to nut before i slept and before my sleeping pill kicked in and my room was dark so I figured why close the blinds.
I was lubing up my cock with silicone lube, felt really good and got my cock really hard and was enjoying what I was watching.
Next thing I realized, I wake up at 11am, dick in hand with lube, lube spilled all over my body and sheets and porn still playing and the neighbors can clearly see what happened.
I live in an apartment area, and at the first floor so everybody next door saw everything. The neighbor right in front of me was having lunch and raised his glass to say cheers to me and smiled.
Advice: cover all your bases before jerking off, and don't jerk under the influence.
President's Day Emoji Pasta PresiDICK's Day
Happy PresiDICKβS πππ½ DAYβΌοΈ Time β°β° to honor the DADDIES π¬π¬ of our nation πΊπΈπΊπΈ George SLUTsington π―π―, Benjamin SPANKlinππ, John HanCOCK ππ½π¦π¦π¦ These POUNDING π¨β fathers ERECTED β¬οΈβ¬οΈ their π»πCUNTstitutional dongs ππfor LADY LIBERTY π½π
π Raise that ASS π to π¦π¦ Abraham LinCUM π¦π¦, π² WOODrow Wilson ππ²π, Bill CLIT-on ππ, and the CUMmander in chief, π¦ππBarCOCK Obama π¦ππ Donβt forget Dwight D. EisenWHORE ππ© DICKlared war π«π£ on those CUMMIES π¦ππ Share in βοΈ SUCKonds or you wonβt be pounding π¨that presidential PUSSY ππ Get 5οΈβ£ back and ur a White House HOE π Get π back and ur the SUCKretary of state πππΊπΈ Get 20 back and the First Lady will make u moan π©π©π¦π¦π¦π¦π¦ HAPPY JIZZIDENTβS DAY!! Hail to the CHEEKS πππ
President's Day
Emoji Pasta
Holiday Emoji
Twitch Memer in his natural habitat
twitchquotes:
Here we can observe the Twitch Memer in his natural habitat, stuck as usual in this intricate limbo of carefully crafted memes, emote spam and endless copypastas that no one even bothers to read anymore. The Memer actually used to be a very functional human being way back then. Will he ever claim that state back and finally manage to reproduce?
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Reynad
Response to a your mom joke
I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents.
EU hearthstone expansion delayed
twitchquotes:
I am from EU my breath smells like poo Expansion delayed And the server's down too
I am from EU my breath smells like poo Expansion delayed And the server's down too
twitch chat
Kripp