[Copypasta] Kripp's recent P*****b purchases

twitchquotes: Well met, Kripp. We thank you for your recent P*****bโ„ข purchase! Your DVD orders "Top Deckin' and Wreckin", "Big Dame Cunter", "BlondeGringo the ShagMasta", "This is my donger scrub... yeah, beat it", and "Savage Whore Combo" should arrive within the week. As always, we thank you for your business, loyal customer!
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp's MALDHAWK

twitchquotes: Late last year, we were on an expedition to find the rarest hairstyle of them all.. the "MALDHAWK" A combination of MALD and a hawk nest, it combines the fluidity of middle aged male pattern baldness to a contrast of dead rats. Much to our chagrin, we found it April 13th, 2020, on a morose Canadian gypsy's stream. He had over 10k viewers at the time of writing this
twitch chat
April 2020
Kripp

Faeria created a strategy...

twitchquotes: Faeria created a strategy that revolved around sponsoring popular streamers without requiring any enjoyable gameplay. Trying to promote new and innovative games makes an overall stream more fun and compelling, but not bothering to explain the game and leaving the chat confused during the entire stream is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

What's that?

twitchquotes: "Octavian," weeps a heartbroken Rania, "we need to talk. I'm not happy anymore. Your frail, vegan body no longer satisfies me. I asked you for a child, and all you gave me was this mangy mutt. Well, I've got news for you. I'm pregnant, and I bet you know who the father is. That's right, it's Tanner from Foot Locker. I'm leaving you, Octavian, you've ruined everything. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" Kripp lifts the headphone off his ear and glances in Rania's direction. "What's that?"
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp

Kripp, eat chicken

twitchquotes: Kripp this is Dr. Zeus Stromboloupolous. We need you to immediately star drinking MILK and EAT chicken at least once every week. Otherwise RIP is veganiro pepperoni
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Worst Matchup

twitchquotes: Worst Matchup: Warrior โœ“ Shaman โœ“ Priest โœ“ Rogue โœ“ Druid โœ“ Warlock โœ“ Hunter โœ“ Mage โœ“ Paladin โœ“
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
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