[Copypasta] Never raise a child who likes Jake and Logan Paul

twitchquotes: My son πŸ‘¦πŸ» can be homer sexual πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆ My daughter πŸ‘§πŸ» can be lebanese πŸ‘­ But I will NEVER ‼️ Raise a child πŸ‘ΆπŸ» who likes Jake and Logan Paul πŸ™…πŸ»β€
twitch chat
August 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
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Thinking Emoji

β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’ β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’ β–’β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’ β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’
May 2017

Classic

I hate the French language

I struggle to find the right words to describe just how much I hate the French language. I'm not racist but I think the world would really be a better place if all French speakers just stopped speaking French and learned a normal language. Nothing about this language remotely makes sense, or is even internally consistent. Why are there so many silent letters? Half the words have pronunciations which somewhat resemble their spelling, and the other half seems like French people just decided to add a bunch of letters so they can act like they're better than everyone else. The language seems like it's deliberately constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. Why the hell do verbs have different conjugations for you, me, he/she, we, you(plural), and them? Even the English language doesn't have that many arbitrary conjugations. I made an honest attempt to learn French, I really did, but the language is just filled with bullshit rules for grammar and everything else. Whichever way you look at it, it's almost as if French is constructed to be as difficult to learn as possible. For real, English isn't my first language but I learned it just fine; trying to learn French after that feels like bashing my head against the wall. This is somewhat irrelevant, but I've heard that some French speakers who speak some English like to pretend they don't speak it when you talk to them. Why do you have to make life difficult for everyone, I'm not going to make fun of you for speaking English poorly. That's not even mentioning how metropolitan French has a superiority complex over other variations of French, all neutral observers will agree that they are equally shit. Also I've heard that some French speakers tend to discriminate against people who speak a local dialect of French, as if one version of a language is better than all others. Sure, the same thing happens with English, but at least the English language doesn't suck.
April 2022

Mutant Seagull

April 2017

I'm Johnny Pasterino from the Department of Legends

twitchquotes: Hi it's Johnny Pasterino from the Department of Legends, we would like to promote Michael Santana from Meme Secretary at the League of Legends to Meme Lord at our Department of Legends. Thank you for your time
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Trump wakes up chained to the wall

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up chained to the wall of a small room with Kripp standing over him. Orange Juice begins pouring from the walls, quickly filling the space. Trump screams in horror as he struggles to get free. Kripp walks out, shuts the door and sits down to begin his stream, the white wall of the death chamber visible behind him for all his viewers to see
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing