[Copypasta] No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

twitchquotes: 4Head No girlfriend 4Head No friends 4Head No talents 4Head Saturday night alone 4Head Wasting time on Twitch 4Head Watching a dead game 4Head Reading the chat more than the stream 4Head Spamming pastas brainlessly 4Head Must be me
twitch chat
September 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp is MY MAN

twitchquotes: Ｄｅａｒ Ｋｒｉｐｐ＇ｓ Ｇａｙ Ｇｒｅｅｋ Ｂｏｙｆｒｉｅｎｄ， ｙｏｕ ｐｉｅｃｅ ｏｆ ｅｌ ｄｏｇ ｓｈｉｔｅｒｉｎｏ． Ｔｈｅ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｉｓ ＭＹ ＭＡＮ． Ａｎｄ ｙｏｕ ｂｅｔｔｅｒ ｂａｃｋ ｔｈｅ ｆｕｃｋ ｏｆｆ． Ｐｌｚ ｎｏ ｃｏｐｙ ｐａｓｔｅｒｉｎｏ ａｌ ｐａｃｉｎｏ ｐｉｓｔａｃｈｉｏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Bear hands up

⡰⠴⠢⠈⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢙⣐⡰⢺ ⠺⢀⡃⠋⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢀⠄⠠⠤⠄⠤⠤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⠸⣿⠟⢸ ⡤⣿⣿⡧⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠰⠋⢀⠄⠄⡀⠤⣶⡾⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠄⠄⠄⡇ ⠑⠉⠉⠁⠅⢰⡦⠉⡙⡽⠄⠄⠜⠛⠴⠊⠄⡀⢼⣧⡀⠅⠄⠄⠄⡌⠄⠄⠄⢴ ⢰⠄⠄⠄⠘⡌⢷⡄⢁⠁⠈⠄⠄⢀⡃⣠⣾⣆⣼⣿⣧⡗⠄⠄⢰⡅⠄⠄⠘⢿ ⠸⡀⠄⠄⠄⠘⢄⠙⡎⡇⡦⠄⠄⠈⠹⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡇⠄⢀⣇⠂⠄⠄⣌⢸ ⠄⡟⠄⠄⠄⠰⠼⢢⡳⣄⢀⡀⠂⠄⠄⠣⣿⣿⠄⠄⡿⢱⢠⠞⠆⠄⠄⠄⠰⣾ ⠄⡃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠓⣟⢰⠁⠐⠄⠄⠄⠉⠑⠄⠄⢐⠊⠍⠉⠁⠄⠄⠐⠶⣪ ⠠⢾⡈⣄⡤⠄⠄⠄⠘⠘⠑⢡⡄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡬⢗⡎ ⠄⠬⢧⣄⠖⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⠙⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠰⡝⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢈⣳⣭⡃⠆⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄▄▄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⠁⠄ ⡀⢐⣛⠿⠿⠛⢻⣿⢶⣰⢀⡢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄█░░▀▄⠄⠄⠁⡠⣟⠆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣻⣧⣇⠊⢙⢣⡄⠄⠄⠄▀▄░░▀▄⠄⠄⢀⣙⠛⠨⡄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠿⢿⣲⠄⣁⡀⠄⠄▀▄░░▀▄⠄⠄⠐⠑⠾⢨⠆ ⠤⠖⠒⠚⣿⣿⣿⣿⣣⠶⠦⠷⠁⣔⡯⠄⠄▄▀░░░░█⠄⠐⠖⠋⠄⢪⠄
ascii art
March 2021

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out

Natalie Portman is the reason I work out. I have this fantasy where we start talking at the Vanity Fair Oscars party bar. We exchange a few pleasantries. She asks what I do. I say I loved her in New Girl. She laughs. I get my drink. "Well, see ya," I say and walk away. I've got her attention now. How many guys voluntarily leave a conversation with Natalie Portman? She touches her neck as she watches me leave. Later, as the night's dragged on and the coterie of gorgeous narcissists grows increasingly loose, she finds me on the balcony, my bowtie undone, smoking a cigarette. "Got a spare?" she asks. "What's in it for me?" I say as I hand her one of my little white ladies. She smiles. "Conversation with me, duh." I laugh. "What's so funny?" she protests. "Nothing, nothing... It's just... don't you grow tired of the egos?" "You get used to it," she says, lighting her cigarette and handing me back the lighter. "What would you do if you weren't an actress?" I ask. "Teaching, I think." "And if I was your student, what would I be learning?" "Discipline," she says quickly, looking up into my eyes, before changing the subject. "Where are you from?" "Bermuda," I say. "Oh wow. That's lovely." "It's ok," I admit. "Not everything is to my liking." "What could possibly be not to your liking in Bermuda?" she inquires. "I don't like sand," I tell her. "It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."
January 2021

Classic

wake up this is all a dream

twitchquotes: wake up thijs PepeHands this is all a dream, but we don't have enough money to keep you living through your coma PepeHands we tried everything, if you don't wake up in a week we'll have to unplug you. PepeHands we love you PepeHands
twitch chat
June 2019
Thijs

If you ever need a man to be the kiwi to your pie...

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ɢɪʀʟ, ɪ ʜᴇᴀʀ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇs, sᴏ ʜᴏᴡ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴡᴇ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs? ɪ'ᴅ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴇʀᴏɴɪ ᴀɴʏ ᴅᴀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴇᴛ ᴍᴇ sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇᴅ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅɪɢɴɪᴛASS (ʜᴇʜᴇ). ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴀ ᴍᴀɴ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪᴡɪ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘɪᴇ, ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍʏ ғᴇᴅᴏʀᴀ ᴀʀᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴛᴏ sᴏᴍᴇ ᴄʀᴜᴢɪɴ' ᴀɴᴅ ʙʀᴜᴢɪɴ' ᴀɴᴅ ɪ'ᴍ ʀᴀʀɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ғɪʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍʏ ɢᴏʟᴅᴇɴ ɢʟᴜᴇ. ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴏ ᴛʜʀᴏᴡɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʙᴀʀᴏɴ, ᴏʀ ɪ'ʟʟ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʟᴇғᴛ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴜᴛ ᴄʀᴜᴍʙᴢ
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing