[Copypasta] I can't go to Yemen, I'm an analyst!

twitchquotes: DansGame "I can't go to Yemen, I'm an analyst!" KevinTurtle "Get on the plane." 🎢🎡I'm only human after all don't put. your blame on me🎡🎢
twitch chat
September 2018
With the launch of Jack Ryan on Amazon Prime, the show's commercial was playing all over Twitch.
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Hey guys Saltarian here

twitchquotes: Hey guys Saltarian here, just want to let chat know that in order to survive I need to Feast upon the salt energy that kripp produces upon experiencing a long bout of bad luck. So please snipe and emote him in ways that will evoke his true salt essence. with enough salt I will take control of his scrawny vegan body and I will give chat what they have been waiting for all along...
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

A boy asked a girl in a library

twitchquotes: A boy asked a girl in a library, "Do you mind if I sit beside you"? The girl Answered with a loud angry voice; "I don't want to spend the night with you!! All the people in the library started staring at the boy and he was embarrassed. After minutes the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and said to him I study psychology and I know what man is think, I guess you felt embarrassed,right? The guy responded with a loud voice :$300 for one night That's too much!! and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock and the guy whispered in her ears, "I study law and I know how to make someone guilty.
twitch chat
August 2020

πŸ‘…HAPPY NEW YEARS SLUTS πŸ†

πŸ‘―hey SlutS! πŸ‘―πŸ’… Now that we got our yearly 🎁 FUCK πŸ‘ŠπŸΌfrom good ole Saint DICK πŸŽ…πŸΎ it’s FINALLY New Years Eve!!!πŸ—“πŸΎπŸ‘… 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ was a LONGG πŸ†πŸ† and HARD πŸ˜‰βœŠπŸ»πŸ˜« year.... we laughedπŸ˜‚πŸ˜†πŸ‘ŒπŸΌ We cried πŸ˜’πŸ˜–πŸ‘Ž We coughed πŸ’¦πŸ€’πŸ€§ we fucked GOODπŸ‘πŸ» dickπŸ† and 😡😡BAD πŸ˜” dick, 😫 BUTT πŸ‘ now let’s πŸ‘πŸ‘Celebrate πŸ™ŒπŸŽ‰ and watch that πŸ’¦πŸ†BIG πŸ‘… BALL πŸ˜ŽπŸ‘ŒπŸΌ Drop πŸ‘„πŸ‘„ on us! πŸ’ƒπŸ’ƒ So spread πŸ‘πŸ½ those πŸ‘πŸ½ legs πŸ‘πŸ½ and count down ⬇️ from πŸ”Ÿ until your man πŸ’ͺ🏾 pops πŸŽ‰ his CORK 🍾🍾 into that thirsty πŸ‘…thirsty πŸ‘… hole! πŸ₯°πŸ₯° Send this to 2️⃣1️⃣ COCK-BEGGING βœŠπŸ»πŸ† WHORES to get BUTTFUCKED πŸ‘πŸ˜± for the next 3️⃣6️⃣5️⃣ days 😍😍😍
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

New Years

Holiday Emoji

NSFW

Holiday

Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground

twitchquotes: Hey, Mr. Morosan, this is Mike from Video Playground, the adult marketplace. You've been ignoring my calls about your outstanding debt of $12.99 for Big Vegan Balls IV. I'm not here to shame or embarrass you for your taste in husky, sweaty man love, but I've got a business to run, and I wouldn't be able to provide you with the entertainment you frequently enjoy if I didn't get paid. Please don't make me revoke your platinum membership.
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing