[Copypasta] Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure

twitchquotes: Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
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Steve Yuen "You Are Gay"

Have you even been walking down the street with your best bro, and while you're walking you accidentally touch hands. You think to yourself, "that was weird, but, I'm not gay". You are. You are gay.
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Grubhub perks gives you deals on the food you love

Grubhub perks gives you deals on the food you love ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⢿⢿⡿⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⣟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⠛⢛⣋⣁⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡏⠀⠀⣸⣿⣯⠟⡛⠻⣿⣆⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⣠⣿⢻⣿⣤⣍⣸⣿⠛⣿⠁⠏⠉⢹⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⠃⠀⠈⠉⠉⠛⢿⡼⠿⢶⣶⣶⣿⣃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡿⠋⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⠿⠷⠏⠁⣠⣄⠀⠀⠀⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⡿⠋⠀⠀⢿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢷⣦⣤⣤⡟⠻⡷⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠟⢿⣄⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⣉⣉⣴⡆⠀⠀⢀⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣴⡿⠁⠀⠀⢻⣷⡀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣏⠉⠀⠀⣠⣿⢿⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⡄⠀⠀⠛⢿⣦⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣰⡿⠁⠈⢿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣾⣃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⠋⣱⡿⠁⠀⢠⠈⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠰⣿⢱⣦⠀⠘⠀⢹⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The kind of deals that make you boogie
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Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here

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twitch chat
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Kripp

sellout

I screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral

Me (M 9) screamed "dead body reported" at my aunts funeral. My mom said that my aunt died and that we are going to her funeral the next morning. As soon as she left the room crying I busted put laughing because it reminded me of among us a popular video game. So as we were riding in the car I was thinking about saying "dead body reported" at the funeral. When we finnaly arived I screamed "dead body reported" everyone was looking me like if some sort of a weirdo. Then I remembered that my grandfather's sister fell in the vents and died when she was 2 years old. So I said grandpa's sister sus she vented. My grandfather started crying and everyone was screaming at me instead of laughing. My mom took my x box and said that I am going to therapist tomorow. Idk my mom is acting kinda sus 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
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