[Copypasta] Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure

twitchquotes: Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Need a STEM mind for Rick and Morty

twitchquotes: Teenagers and man children according to who? You? What is your standard? I'm a fan of Rick and Morty, and I've been watching since episode one. Most of my friends who are scientists love the show, because it has a sense of humor and plot lines that you need a STEM mind simply to follow, let alone interpret and appreciate. Most of the people who diss the show are standard literature, philosophy, sociology a business majors who would rather watch shit like The Office or How I Met Your Mother and other shit-tier shows. Get off your high horse
twitch chat
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Goku drip

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣤⣤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣦⠈⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣶⣦⣍⠐⢼⣿⣿⣧⠈⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣿⣿⣿⣦⣴⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢠⣄⣒⣚⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡧⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⡽⣿⠟⢃⣿⠟⡉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠶⢯⣭⣿⢹⡟⢶⣗⠀⢸⠇⢁⣠⠫⠟⣹⣿⣯⡭⠶⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢙⣄⠣⠁⠈⠓⠊⠐⠃⠀⠀⣰⣿⣏⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢉⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣯⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠘⢛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣧⣀⡀⠶⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣠⣀⣀⣿⡿⠃⢢⣠⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠿⣿⡿⣷⡿⠿⣿⢿⡿⠩⢹⣿⡟⠉⠉⠉⢹⣿⢻⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣷⣿⣿⠉⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡾⢶⣿⣦⣿⣷⡇⢁⠚⡇⠐⢀⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣿⣧⣀⣠⣇⡰⢀⡿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣵⡎⠹⣿⣿⣿⣁⣾⢻⣿⢻⣟⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣥⣾⣿⡿⠛⠛⢛⡟⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣞⣰⠞⣩⣿⣻⡇⢠⠃⠸⠉⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⢈⡁⠤⠁⠌⢉⢙⣿⣐⣧⣤⣾⢇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡿⢿⢋⡍⢇⠛⣿⣧⣼⣦⣴⣔⣠⣿⣿⣿⣯⣦⣤⣦⣤⣦⣄⣸⡻⢛⠋⠉⠻⠿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠀⣆⣷⣴⣶⠿⣿⡿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⢿⣿⢉⠉⣿⣿⣷⣾⣤⣭⡁⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠐⣉⣌⠇⠐⠁⡄⣿⣿⣿⠈⡠⢾⡇⠠⠠⣼⣽⡟⢣⠄⣹⣿⡖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣉⠁⣿⣷⣿⡟⢿⡵⣾⣶⣦⣿⣿⣿⣴⣷⣾⣷⠖⡴⠿⣿⣿⠷⠚⢛⡻⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣆⣿⣿⣿⣧⠐⡅⢘⠃⣿⣿⣿⣟⠿⡿⣿⣧⣈⠴⢃⠘⣻⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⢻⣿⠃⢸⣿⣶⣿⡿⡟⢉⣿⢿⣻⣼⣧⠂⠛⢿⣷⣟⣀⣥⡼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣏⡙⣿⣾⣿⣿⠿⢄⠉⣸⡿⠁⠉⠉⠟⢬⢛⢚⠻⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⣦⣅⣙⣿⣧⣮⣬⣽⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⢶⣶⣮⢧⢠⠙⣰⢹⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⣽⣶⣿⣿⣷⣼⠟⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢥⣏⢿⢯⣿⡟⠀⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣠⢈⠲⠟⣛⠏⣍⣏⠬⣄⡺⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣾⣿⣃⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣒⣴⣦⣾⣶⣾⣶⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀
March 2021

Jim Cramer responds to GameStop apes on Twitter

But you know what? I miss the good people whom i used to interact before these pathetic parodies of human minds ascended from the gates of hell. Well, now that i know they are going broke and just care about Gamestop and pump and dump schemes I will end their tyranny. NOW
September 2021

WallStreetBets

6.84 dota patch was found dead at his hotel room

twitchquotes: Breaking News : Much expected 6.84 dota patch was found dead at his hotel room. Police suspects gunshot wounds found at victims body might be caused from a long range rifle. Witnesses reported "Hoho" "Haha" sounds was heared right before shooting.
twitch chat
April 2015
Dendi

Dota 2

Positive "Give me a second guys" copypasta

twitchquotes: “Give me a second, guys,” Kripp says. “Gotta hit up the bathroom” He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately springs up from his chair and shouts "I LOVE THIS GAME!" before giving Dex a swift pat on the head. As Dex yips loudly in delight, Kripp runs over to give Rania a kiss on the cheek. Rania then tries to take out the trash, but Kripp swiftly grabs the bag from her and does it for her. Elated, Kripp wipes the sweat off his forehead, sits back down, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
November 2020
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing