[Copypasta] Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure

twitchquotes: Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
November 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

AITA for drop kicking my 2 month old sister down the stairs?

Some backstory required: Earlier today I was trying to relax but she wouldn't stop fucking making annoying ass googoo gaga noises. So today, I see her, and she is actually standing up! First I think to take a picture and tell my parents, but than I remember what an entitled bitch she is. I run forward, and leap forward and plant both my feet in her face as we both tumble down the stairs. I told my parents that she crawked in front of me whilst I was about to use the stairs so I'm out of trouble, and the surgery went fine and she is basically fine although she seems to have fucking learned her lesson as she 'talks' a lot less now. Next time she does this I'm uppercutting her entitled little baby skull
August 2021

Am I The Asshole?

I am glad I'm not a Pleb

twitchquotes: Honestly fuck the plebs.. they always bring toxic comments into the chat and I can't stand them any more. They think they are great but in reality they are Dumb Asses and are annoying af. I am glad I'm not a stupid ass Pleb
twitch chat
September 2017

plebs vs subs

Harambe Rick Harrison

twitchquotes: Hi. I'm Harambe, and this is my Zoo. I live here with my old zookeeper and banana, Big Yellow. Everything in here has a heart and a mind. One thing I've learned after 17 years - you never know WHAT is gonna come over that enclosure.
twitch chat
August 2016

Rick Harrison

Classic

Harambe

gachiGASM

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–“β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–„β–“β–‘β–’β–„β–„β–„β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–‘β–„β–‘β–„β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–€β–’β–€β–’β–“β–’β–“β–‘β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–“β–’β–“β–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–’β–’β–’β–“ β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–€β–„β–’β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–‘
April 2016

KappaPride

Classic

Hello Mr. Morosan! This is the salt truck driver

twitchquotes: ΰΌΌ Ν β€’ Ω„Νœ β€’ ΰΌ½ Κœα΄‡ΚŸΚŸα΄ ᴍʀ. ᴍᴏʀᴏsα΄€Ι΄! α΄›ΚœΙͺs Ιͺs α΄›Κœα΄‡ sα΄€ΚŸα΄›-α΄›Κ€α΄œα΄„α΄‹-α΄…Κ€Ιͺᴠᴇʀ. Ιͺ'ᴍ Κœα΄‡Κ€α΄‡ ᴛᴏ α΄…α΄‡ΚŸΙͺᴠᴇʀ Κα΄α΄œΚ€ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀ ᴏꜰ 69 ᴛᴏɴs ᴏꜰ α΄©α΄œΚ€α΄‡ sα΄€ΚŸα΄› κœ°Κ€α΄α΄ α΄›Κœα΄‡ κœ°α΄€α΄α΄α΄œs sα΄€ΚŸα΄›α΄Ιͺɴᴇ "üʙᴇʀᴋÀᴋᴇɴᴋᴏᴛᴒɴ" ΙͺΙ΄ α΄›Κœα΄‡ α΄€ΚŸα΄©s. Ιͺꜰ ʏᴏᴜ'α΄… ʟΙͺᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀ ᴍᴏʀᴇ sα΄€ΚŸα΄›, ΚŸα΄‡α΄› ᴍᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴑ! ɒᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ sΙͺΚ€! ΰΌΌ Ν β€’ Ω„Νœ β€’ ΰΌ½
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing