[Copypasta] my first attempt at making a copypasta

twitchquotes: ok guys this is my first attempt at making a copypasta so wish me luck
twitch chat
October 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Double Social Credit Weekend

‼️ ATTENTION ALL GAMERS ‼️ ζ³¨ζ„εŠ› DOUBLE 2οΈβƒ£βŽ SOCIAL CREDIT η€ΎδΌšδΏ‘η”¨ WEEKEND ε‘¨ζœ« IN CHINA δΈ­ε›½ ❗STARTING NOW❗ START ⏯️ YOUR GRIND 研磨 ‼️NOW‼️ MAKE GLORIOUS LEADER ε…‰θ£ηš„ι’†θ’– PROUD! ‼️ GLORY TO THE CHINESE COMMUNIST PARTY 中共‼️
November 2021

Social Credit Score

A full golden Hearthstone collection

twitchquotes: Lieutenant General Octavian, we regret to inform you that the Chinese have successfully built a full golden Hearthstone collection before you with their superior economy and rng. You are hereby relieved of all duties pertaining to the hell we call Hearthstone...It's over, Kripp.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: β€’ ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight β€’ ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor β€’ ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) β€’ ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns β€’ ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man β€’ ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" β€’ ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos β€’ ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) β€’ ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

69 nice

twitchquotes: Oh you think you’re funny eh? Yeah you’re so funny commenting nice on a number that represents reproduction. Yeah so funny. Wouldn’t it be nice if somebody came at your doorstep at 4:20 am with a bat that has 69 written on it? Yeah that will be as funny as your joke.
twitch chat
October 2020

Le Toucan has arrived

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–„β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘leβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘toucanβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘hasβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘arrivedβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘
January 2015

Classic

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