[Copypasta] Twitch Chat containment solution

twitchquotes: International efforts to contain the most toxic and dangerous internet dwellers have failed time and time again, until a secret organisation offered to build a prison for internet's worst scum. The project codenamed "Twitch Chat" pretending to be an addition to a livestreaming service has proven to be a very effective containment solution.
twitch chat
January 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Kripp Jong Un

twitchquotes: ໒( •̀ ╭ ͟ʖ╮ •́ )७ It is me Kripp Jong Un. I demand that all showings of "Topdecking and Wrecking 3: Gripped and Kripped" be removed immediately. Those who refuse will be pepperonied ໒( •̀ ╭ ͟ʖ╮ •́ )७
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Travis Scott Burger

I have a theory about the Travis Scott burger. I think it’s a sham. It’s all a multi million dollar misinformation campaign. McDonalds has been hurting for a new supply of beef due to the Covid 19 pandemic. With all of the meat processing plant closures, they had to look elsewhere to get their precious beef for the ever so hungry American. They needed a new supplier. This has to be nobody other than Travis Scott. You see, since marrying Kylie Jenner, he had access to all of her cosmetic company’s animal testing plants. It was easy for Travis to get ahold of meat... it was too easy. Travis knew McDonalds was desperate for new meat, so he struck while the iron was hot. Through a swift negotiation, he had the multi billion dollars corporation by the balls, the sweet sweet balls. Travis agreed to supply them with the meat, only he lead them to believe it was coming from cows when in reality he was harvesting the animals from the animal cosmetic testing lab. In exchange, he got his name on the McDonalds menu. All for what? Now you may be wondering how I came across this info. And you may be wondering who sent you this information. It was Cactus Jack. Cactus Jack sent this info.
October 2020

Peruvians and Dota 2

twitchquotes: Let's look at this statistically. Assuming you are not Peruvian, your team has four chances to spawn a Peruvian. The other team has five chances to spawn a Peruvian. Overall, you will have less Peruvians then your opponents, and will automatically rise on the ladder. If you aren't rising, you are probably secretly a Peruvian, ruining the statistical balance of sweet victory.
twitch chat
February 2015
SingSing

Dota 2

Mew

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠞⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠋⠀⢰⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢆⣤⡞⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢠⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣾⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⡤⠴⠊⠉⠀⠀⠈⠳⡀⠀⠀⠘⢎⠢⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠳⣄⠀⠀⡠⡤⡀⠀⠘⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠒⠺⠭⢵⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢹⡆⠀⢷⡇⠁⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢤⠀⠀⠘⢷⣆⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⠒⢤⡄⠖⢾⣭⣤⣄⠀⡔⢢⠀⡀⠎⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⡀ ⠀⠀⢀⡤⠜⠃⠀⠀⠘⠛⣿⢸⠀⡼⢠⠃⣤⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠸⠶⠖⢏⠀⠀⢀⡤⠤⠇⣴⠏⡾⢱⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣇⡀⠿⠀⠀⠀⡽⣰⢶⡼⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⠟⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⢤⣀⡶⠤⣷⣅⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡠⢔⠕⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠫⠿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀
January 2022

Pokemon

Warrior vs warrior

twitchquotes: HEH, GREETINGS ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper I can take the hit ResidentSleeper Welcome to the grand tournament ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper I'M OUT OF CARDS
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing