[Copypasta] For people that use "XD"

twitchquotes: But the real question is, when this musing entered your mind, did you really make such a face? Was it so funny that your face contorted into a gaping wide-mouthed smile as your eyes aggressively squinted shut? Did you truly "ex dee"? Were you able to see your screen as you typed with your eyes held steadfast as though they were steel vice grips clamping with hundreds of pounds of force?
twitch chat
February 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

Classic

Sense of pride and accomplishment

twitchquotes: The ๐Ÿ’ฐ intent ๐Ÿ’ฐ is ๐Ÿ’ฐ to ๐Ÿ’ฐ provide ๐Ÿ’ฐ players ๐Ÿ’ฐ with ๐Ÿ’ฐ a ๐Ÿ’ฐ sense ๐Ÿ’ฐ of ๐Ÿ’ฐ pride ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ accomplishment ๐Ÿ’ฐ for ๐Ÿ’ฐ unlocking ๐Ÿ’ฐ different ๐Ÿ’ฐ heroes. ๐Ÿ’ฐ As ๐Ÿ’ฐ for ๐Ÿ’ฐ cost, ๐Ÿ’ฐ we ๐Ÿ’ฐ selected ๐Ÿ’ฐ initial ๐Ÿ’ฐ values ๐Ÿ’ฐ based ๐Ÿ’ฐ upon ๐Ÿ’ฐ data ๐Ÿ’ฐ from ๐Ÿ’ฐ the ๐Ÿ’ฐ Open ๐Ÿ’ฐ Beta ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ other ๐Ÿ’ฐ adjustments ๐Ÿ’ฐ made ๐Ÿ’ฐ to ๐Ÿ’ฐ milestone ๐Ÿ’ฐ rewards ๐Ÿ’ฐ before ๐Ÿ’ฐ launch. ๐Ÿ’ฐ Among ๐Ÿ’ฐ other ๐Ÿ’ฐ things, ๐Ÿ’ฐ we're ๐Ÿ’ฐ looking ๐Ÿ’ฐ at ๐Ÿ’ฐ average ๐Ÿ’ฐ per-player ๐Ÿ’ฐ credit ๐Ÿ’ฐ earn ๐Ÿ’ฐ rates ๐Ÿ’ฐ on ๐Ÿ’ฐ a ๐Ÿ’ฐ daily ๐Ÿ’ฐ basis, ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ we'll ๐Ÿ’ฐ be ๐Ÿ’ฐ making ๐Ÿ’ฐ constant ๐Ÿ’ฐ adjustments ๐Ÿ’ฐ to ๐Ÿ’ฐ ensure ๐Ÿ’ฐ that ๐Ÿ’ฐ players ๐Ÿ’ฐ have ๐Ÿ’ฐ challenges ๐Ÿ’ฐ that ๐Ÿ’ฐ are ๐Ÿ’ฐ compelling, ๐Ÿ’ฐ rewarding, ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ of ๐Ÿ’ฐ course ๐Ÿ’ฐ attainable ๐Ÿ’ฐ via ๐Ÿ’ฐ gameplay. We ๐Ÿ’ฐ appreciate ๐Ÿ’ฐ the ๐Ÿ’ฐ candid ๐Ÿ’ฐ feedback, ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ the ๐Ÿ’ฐ passion ๐Ÿ’ฐ the ๐Ÿ’ฐ community ๐Ÿ’ฐ has ๐Ÿ’ฐ put ๐Ÿ’ฐ forth ๐Ÿ’ฐ around ๐Ÿ’ฐ the ๐Ÿ’ฐ current ๐Ÿ’ฐ topics ๐Ÿ’ฐ here ๐Ÿ’ฐ on ๐Ÿ’ฐ Reddit, ๐Ÿ’ฐ our ๐Ÿ’ฐ forums ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ across ๐Ÿ’ฐ numerous ๐Ÿ’ฐ social ๐Ÿ’ฐ media ๐Ÿ’ฐ outlets. Our ๐Ÿ’ฐ team ๐Ÿ’ฐ will ๐Ÿ’ฐ continue ๐Ÿ’ฐ to ๐Ÿ’ฐ make ๐Ÿ’ฐ changes ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ monitor ๐Ÿ’ฐ community ๐Ÿ’ฐ feedback ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ update ๐Ÿ’ฐ everyone ๐Ÿ’ฐ as ๐Ÿ’ฐ soon ๐Ÿ’ฐ and ๐Ÿ’ฐ as ๐Ÿ’ฐ often ๐Ÿ’ฐ as ๐Ÿ’ฐ we ๐Ÿ’ฐ can. ๐Ÿ’ฐ
twitch chat
November 2017

I had dreams and ambitions of becoming a pro 1v1 player

twitchquotes: Hello OddOne, my name is Gustavian. I had dreams and ambitions, of becoming a professional 1v1 player. I picked this game up yesterday, with hopes and dreams. But you picked a fucking stupid op noob champ, and i lost my 2 bucks because of you. Now i have to stay at my aunts house in Nigeria, because i cant take the train home to Uganda.
twitch chat
September 2014
TheOddOne

Can Everyone stop spamming J LUL K E

twitchquotes: Can Everyone stop spamming J LUL K E he is a pro player that is on the level far above any of you will ever be and its disrespectful for him as a legend dps to play junkrat when J LUL K E is being spammed
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

NA, aka 'No Achievements'

twitchquotes: NA, aka 'No Achievements' is the weakest region in the professional League of Legends scene. They are specifically known for their clown fiestas and never winning anything worthwhile in the history of League of Legends.
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing