[Copypasta] Chat stop spamming XD

twitchquotes: Hey chat, right now im very sleepy and unable to read chat. I got my dog reading chat out loud for me so i can enjoy chat with you guys. He keeps yelling "XD" to me so i suspect chat is spamming XD. Plz stop as youre confusing my dog and hes getting upset. Thank you much appreciate.
twitch chat
May 2019
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More Copypastas

Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

The Picture

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, Micheal here. Yes, your highschool boyfriend. I still have our private picture. "The picture". If you dont want this to be posted on internet - send me your cat.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Lockwood Streets 112

twitchquotes: An MR-RL time. Me and Marc Rutzou. Me and fucking Marc Rutzou. That's fucking right. I skipped 1:13. I am a fucking legend. I've never SEEN a 1:13 and I never fucking will. 1:12 baby. Til the day I fucking die. YES!!! Bout time I get a fucking lucky break in this fucking game. MotherFUCKERS! And I CLUTCHED the goddamn grenade launcher. That's FUCKING right. Yeah it's this one. Right here IT'S THIS ONE! My insane pace. Right here! THIS is the 1:12. Right here. YES!!! It's fucking it. I'mma have to jus - I'mma have to find the actual whole vid of it and I'mma have to get it. DUUUUUUUDE WHAT A RUSH! WHAT A RUUUUUUSH! Watch this. Watch when I get the grenade launcher. (sorry) Look at that. See how fast my pace is? Right in the FUCKING HEAD!!! YEEEAAAHHH! Got a FUCKING 1:12 baby. That's RIGHT! You see that CLUTCHNESS? I AM FUCKING CCC-LUTCH! Look at this fucking line I take. I'm like, YEAH baby. Let's fucking DO this. I wait I wait I wait... Right when he starts firing to try to backboost me. The double. Body armor. Two quick ones. I already know I'm gettin' there on the perfect line. LOOK AT THE FUCKING PACE! FIFTY! FOURTY-NINE! MWH FOURTY-SEVEN BABY! That's FUCKING right. That's FUCKING IT! Fucking PUMPED watching this one again. I waited the cinema too 'cause i said oh my God it might be 1:12. And it FUCKING IS!!! IT FUCKING IS baby. YEAH!!! Look at me typing you guys. You guys didn't believe me. I am typing a storm. Dude I FUCKING just got Streets 1:12! It's not fucking comin' off. YES!!! I FUCKING DID IT THAT'S RIGHT! I SKIPPED 1:13 I'M A LEGEND. I AM A FUCKING LEGEND. I'm a FUCKING legend. (YES!) I am a fucking legend.
twitch chat
May 2020

Hi Kripp this is Battlemaster's wife Housewifemaster

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp this is Battlemaster's wife Housewifemaster, i've noticed that my husband is never home to play with the Childrenmasters and they are really missing their Fathermaster. Could you choose my dear Husbandmaster less so that my kids can grow up with an actual Dadmaster? Thank you Kripp, maybe he can take you to Gymmaster so you can put some muscle on that scrawny vegan body.
twitch chat
May 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

amongX

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣥⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣾⣬⣙⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢥⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣾⣏⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣉⣹⣿⠄⢡⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢸⣿⢋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢈⠙⣿⠄⢸⣿⣧⠽⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⣿⣿⣧⣻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⡿⠋⢼⣿⣿⠾⠛⠛⠁⠈⠁⡓⠛⢿⣿⣿⡟⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣇⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⠧⣿⣿⣇⠄⢛⣻⣿⣿⠶⠒⠓⠒⢒⠓⠄⠸⣿⣿⡇⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⢛⣿⣿⣷⣦⣿⡿⣿⡇⠘⠛⠛⢿⣿⢿⣸ ⣿⣿⣿⡄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⡾⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⢠⣬⣭⣤⣼⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⠟⠟⠿⠏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠃⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡯⠘⡍⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⣀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
xQcOW

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing