[Copypasta] Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat!

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?

June 2021

The unluckiest human ever

twitchquotes: BREAKING NEWS - Canadian scientists have discovered what they are calling "the unluckiest human ever". The unfortunate individual, a scraggly, foul-smelling, unkempt Canadian man, discovered this condition by badly playing a digital children's card game. "It's literally unbelievable, dude", the man told scientists. "I play every game perfectly, but my opponents just keep topdecking me!" The man continued to whine incessantly until, unfortunately, he dropped dead of a salt overdose.

twitch chat

June 2016

Kripp

Donkey Kong

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ascii art

September 2021

Hikaru and Magnus fanfic

twitchquotes: "Your chess is insane." Hikaru said, as he slipped his feminine hand into Magnus's pants and smirked. "Are you trying to mate me?" protests Magnus, as Hikaru blushes, the boyish figure undressed before Magnus. "Weak tempo play, Hikaru." The two kissed, deeply and passionately, and afterwards Magnus places his Rook into Hikarus open line.

twitch chat

April 2021

GMHikaru

Chess

Another crewmate with a dick

ascii art

April 2021

[Copypasta] Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat!

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

The unluckiest human ever

Donkey Kong

Hikaru and Magnus fanfic

Chess

Another crewmate with a dick

Among Us / Amogus

NSFW

Summon The Hydra

[Copypasta] Stop getting played like a fiddle, chat!

Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call

The unluckiest human ever

Donkey Kong

Hikaru and Magnus fanfic

Chess

Another crewmate with a dick

Among Us / Amogus

NSFW

Summon The Hydra

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