[Copypasta] My son 🙇was SO cute today

twitchquotes: My son 🙇was SO cute today, he asked me "dad are clouds candy?" I told him they were water. 💦 Then he asked "dad, what's Earth's defense system?" and then I remembered I don't have a son and he asked again his eyes now obsidian black "what is the defense system father"
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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I play Mister Yie in League of Heroes

twitchquotes: That's it noobs, come play me in a game of League of Heroes. I main with the hardest warrior - Mister Yie. I will build full wiji first so you know I'll be able to tank no problem. After that, I will build a Infinite Ledge and score so hardcore attack speed. That's right - I will be victorious
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

The Battle of Gamestop rages on.

The Battle of Gamestop rages on. Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-man’s land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen. When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground we’d lost in the past week. As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds. This war won’t be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wife’s boyfriend to tell her I love her.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

Our dongers will never lower

twitchquotes: OUR BULLETS WILL ANNIHILATE YOU ⁞ つ: •̀ ⌂ •́ : ⁞-︻╦̵══╤─ OUR BLADES WILL PIERCE YOUR SKIN ᗜಠ o ಠ)¤=[]:::::> OUR BEASTS WILL RIP YOU APART ੧〳 ˵ ಠ ᴥ ಠ ˵ 〵ノ⌒. OUR WIZARDS WILL CURSE YOU FOR ETERNITY ༼∩ຈل͜ຈ༽つ━☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ AND OUR DONGERS WILL NEVER LOWER
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Sussy baka (thiccc crewmate)

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣐⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣛⣂⣀⣀⡒⠶⣶⣤⣤⣬⣀⡀⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⢡⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣈⣉⡛⣿⣿⣿⡌⢇⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠺⠟⣉⣴⡿⠛⣩⣾⣎⠳⠿⠛⣋⣩⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣀ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠘⠛ ⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⣀⣀⣠⣤ ⠄⠄⣀⣀⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢛⣩⠤⠾⠄⠛⠋⠉⢉ ⠄⠺⠿⠛⠛⠃⠄⠉⠙⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠉⠁⠄⠄⣀⣀⣠⣤⣠⣴⣶⣼⣿
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September 2021

Among Us / Amogus

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