[Copypasta] My son 🙇was SO cute today

twitchquotes: My son 🙇was SO cute today, he asked me "dad are clouds candy?" I told him they were water. 💦 Then he asked "dad, what's Earth's defense system?" and then I remembered I don't have a son and he asked again his eyes now obsidian black "what is the defense system father"
twitch chat
May 2019
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Raise your right and yell Kripp is a sellout

twitchquotes: 4Head RAISE YOUR ⎝ 4Head RIGHT HAND ⎝ 4Head AND YELL ⎝ 4Head KRIPP IS A SELLOUT ⎝ 4Head
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

sellout

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it?

Hey, vsauce, Micheal here! Why is my peepee hard? Or is it? Well, ya see, we need to start with the peepee itself. The hardening of the peepee is called an erection. Erection. The term itself shares a similarity with our own predecessors, Homo Erectus. That's Latin for Gay Straight. So, naturally, we can start to fill in the picture. Our predecessors, Gay Straights, also had hard peepees. Which brings us back to modern day erections. You see, an erection is a signal to tell you that you are gay, a leftover device from the era of Gay Straights. But what is "gay"? To quote Nelson Mandela, "To be gay is not to love others. It is to love yourself and to stay true in the face of many hardships and hard dicks." In Layman's terms, Nelson Mandela is trying to tell us to go fuck ourselves. This is vital to know because it puts into perspective the absolute size of gayness itself, divided into unique homogenous subgroups. Such a diverse range is exactly why the flag of LGBTQBBQ communities is a rainbow. But, you ask, how does this tie in to what gay Is? I'm getting there. Gay is a slang term for homosexual, which is to have sexual interest in someone of the same gender as yourself. To see more on the topic of gender, click the annotation on my face now for a playlist of videos specifically on the subject. So, to answer your question, your peepee is hard because you're gay. Hopefully today's little snippet was a good brain train for you. If you'd like to find other fun ways to test your mind mettle, click the annotation up here to go see some of my huge DONGs. And, as always, thanks for watching.
August 2021

Disappointed with Giant Enemy Crabgot

twitchquotes: I was INSANELY disappointed once I loaded into summoner's rift on my favourite champion, Urgot, to find that Giant Enemy Crabgot did NOT have a female resting on his left shoulder ingame. This is a HUGE deal as it was one of the main factors of which I purchased the skin. I sincerely ask that you recoup my losses or change the skin to have a female resting on his manly shoulder
twitch chat
January 2017

League of Legends

I sold my sandwich to learn about the Lucian level 2 power spike

twitchquotes: I sᴏʟᴅ ᴍʏ sᴀɴᴅᴡɪᴄʜ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀʀɴ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ Lᴜᴄɪᴀɴ ʟᴇᴠᴇʟ 2 ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀ sᴘɪᴋᴇ. Jᴜsᴛ ᴀs ɪ ᴡᴀs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀ ᴛɪᴇʀ ᴇʟᴏ ʜᴇʟʟ, I ᴅɪᴇᴅ ᴏғ sᴛᴀʀᴠᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. Iғ ᴏɴʟʏ I ʜᴀᴅ ᴇᴀᴛᴇɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴏᴀsᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴜɴᴀ sᴀʟᴀᴅ ʜᴏᴀɢɪᴇ, I ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ᴀʟɪᴠᴇ ᴛᴏᴅᴀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴛʏᴘᴇ ᴛʜɪs
twitch chat
February 2015
imaqtpie

My BODY is machine that turns diary products into spicy liquid diarrhea

My 🤸‍♂️BODY🏋️‍♀️ is a 🚂𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐄🚂 that turns 🐄𝒹𝒶𝒾𝓇𝓎 𝓅𝓇𝑜𝒹𝓊𝒸𝓉𝓈🥛 into ➡ 🔥ⓈⓅⒾⒸⓎ🔥 🐳𝓁𝒾𝓆𝓊𝒾𝒹💦 💩💩𝔻𝕀𝔸ℝℝℍ𝔼𝔸💪💪
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

Text-to-Speech Playing