[Copypasta] My son 🙇was SO cute today

twitchquotes: My son 🙇was SO cute today, he asked me "dad are clouds candy?" I told him they were water. 💦 Then he asked "dad, what's Earth's defense system?" and then I remembered I don't have a son and he asked again his eyes now obsidian black "what is the defense system father"
twitch chat
May 2019
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I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp I'm 12 and I'm your biggest fan! I saw you play Artosis last year at BlizzCon, are you gonna win BlizzCon this year Kripp? I heard you were good at Arena. I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you

You abhorrent scum. You ignorant fool. I will sue you. You are going to be the target of the greatest lawsuit the world has ever seen. You don't know why? It's completely obvious. It's so obvious, the most deplorable peasant could grasp the full magnitude of your wickedness and treachery with the greatest of ease. Your actions cry out for mercy, and I will be happy to deliver it. And if you're thinking this is a mistake, or merely a deception of mine, you're sadly mistaken, my friend. I have indisputable proof of your continued harassment and other offenses. Even without it, the jury would take one look at you and decide. The incomprehensible magnitude of your crimes brings with it unavoidable, infinite guilt, and whether you notice it or not, everyone else does. Are you interested in who will be serving as the offense attorney? I'll tell you. It's my father. Your defense? It doesn't matter, in fact, they might just not give you one even to spare just one individual from the trauma. My father is the greatest lawyer in the US, the world, and human history, including the future, which he knows due to the fact that he sued the future and they travelled back in time to tell him. He's served for hundreds of Supreme Court cases, and he's won every single one. You may have never thought about being court-marshaled, but now, that's a real threat. That is the power of my father, a culmination of flawless, supreme logic and a perfect knowledge of the law. You will lose this case, your money, and your life. Does that scare you, insignificant bug? Because it should. The entire history of the U.S. Judicial System has been leading up to this moment, where all of its fury is concentrated on ruining your life. My father won't even need to help. Your heinous crimes will be evident to all, so just give up, you crook. Give up before you're forced to.
September 2021

Albert Einstein watches Rick and Morty

twitchquotes: My teacher said to my I'm a failure, that I'll never amount to anything. I scoffed at him. Shocked, my teacher asked what's so funny, my future is on the line. "Well...you see professor" I say as the teacher prepares to laugh at my answer, rebuttal at hand. "I watch Rick and Morty." The class is shocked, they merely watch pleb shows like the big bang theory to feign intelligence, not grasping the humor. "...how? I can't even understand it's sheer nuance and subtlety." "Well you see...WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!" One line student laughs in the back, I turn to see a who this fellow genius is. It's none other than Albert Einstein.
twitch chat
September 2017

Classic

Rick and Morty

My name is Dennis Pasterino

twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Ahegao 2

⣿⡇⠘⡇⢀⣶⣶⠄⠈⣾⡟⢂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢉⢾⢃⣿⣿⡟⣸⢸⣿⣿⣸ ⣿⢸⣦⢧⢸⣿⣿⢱⠄⠄⣇⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣼⣿⡯⠸⣿⢳⢱⡏⣼⣿⢇⣿ ⡏⣾⢽⣼⢸⣿⣿⡘⣆⢀⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣫⣾⣿⣿⢇⣿⠂⢌⡾⡇⣿⡿⢸⣿ ⢧⣿⠄⢹⢸⣿⣿⣷⣭⢸⡄⣿⣿⣿⢋⣵⣿⣿⡿⠟⡨⡡⠄⣾⣿⡆⣭⡇⣿⣿ ⣼⡏⡀⠄⢀⢿⣿⣿⡟⣾⡇⣿⡿⣡⢁⣿⣿⣫⡶⢃⡵⣡⣿⣮⡻⡇⣿⢸⣮⢿ ⣿⡇⣧⢠⠸⡎⡍⡭⢾⡏⣧⢋⢾⠏⣼⣿⣿⠿⣵⣾⣕⠿⣿⣿⣷⢡⠏⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⣿⠈⠄⠄⢃⢹⡀⠸⢸⢿⠸⢰⢻⢿⣟⢁⣀⠄⠄⠉⠒⢝⢿⠸⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⡍⠇⣿⣷⢰⢰⢸⠄⡃⡆⠈⠈⡀⡌⠠⠸⠃⣿⣏⡳⢷⢄⡀⠄⠄⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠸⣿⢸⣿⣶⡄⣇⠃⡇⡄⡇⠁⠃⠄⠈⢊⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⢻⣸⣿⣿⠏⡙⢸⣇⣡⢰⢀⠄⠄⠄⠈⡁⢱⢈⢿⣿⡿⡄⣰⣶⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⡿⢰⡇⠆⠲⠶⣝⠾⠸⢴⢠⠄⠇⢸⢸⠄⡶⡜⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⡇⠧⢣⣸⣦⣄⣀⠁⠓⢸⣄⠸⢀⠄⡀⡀⡪⣽⣿⣿⢿⣿⢟⣬ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢧⠯⢸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠰⣷⠄⣿⣇⡿⠄⡀⠦⣰⣿⡿⣱⣿⡏⢾⣫ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣌⢌⢿⣿⣿⠇⠼⢃⢠⢇⣻⣧⣿⡡⣸⣿⠿⢁⡟⢁⣳⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠳⢝⣒⣒⠰⣘⣴⡧⠿⣿⣛⡯⣱⡿⣫⢎⣪⣎⣿⣧⢻⠿
January 2021

Weebs

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