[Copypasta] My son 🙇was SO cute today

twitchquotes: My son 🙇was SO cute today, he asked me "dad are clouds candy?" I told him they were water. 💦 Then he asked "dad, what's Earth's defense system?" and then I remembered I don't have a son and he asked again his eyes now obsidian black "what is the defense system father"
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May 2019
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Magic the Gathering Thought Erasure

twitchquotes: Yesterday, there was a Magic the Gathering tournament at my local hobby shop. My girlfriend decided to tag along and come support me. I ended up doing pretty poorly (1-3), but the hobby shop gave out a consolation prize of a random foiled uncommon card. The card that I received was called "Thought Erasure" and immediately held the card up to my girlfriend and said "AND I CAST THOUGHT ERASURE, BE GONE THOT!" as a joke, but said it pretty loudly. The shop is pretty small and a lot of people caught wind of my act and needless to say my girlfriend was very embarrassed. We're home now and she still hasn't spoken to me. I'm fucked boys.
twitch chat
November 2018

Garfield

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠞⠉⢉⣭⣿⣿⠿⣳⣤⠴⠖⠛⣛⣿⣿⡷⠖⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠁⢀⣶⢻⡟⠿⠋⣴⠿⢻⣧⡴⠟⠋⠿⠛⠠⠾⢛⣵⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣿⡿⢶⣄⠀⢀⡇⢀⡿⠁⠈⠀⠀⣀⣉⣀⠘⣿⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠛⡹⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣭⣤⡈⢑⣼⣻⣿⣧⡌⠁⠀⢀⣴⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⣿⣴⠟⠋⠙⠻⣦⡰⣞⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⢫⣾⠋⣽⠟⠑⠛⢠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡈⠻⣍⠤⢤⣌⣀ ⢀⡞⣡⡌⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣇⠀⢾⣷⢤⣬⣉ ⡞⣼⣿⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠸⣿⣇⠈⠻ ⢰⣿⡿⢹⠃⠀⣠⠤⠶⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⠛⡄⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⡟⡀⠀⠈⡗⠲⠶⠦⢤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣸⣧⣤⣤⠤⠤⣿⣀⡀⠉⣼⡇⠀ ⣿⣴⣴⡆⠀⠀⠻⣄⠀⠀⠡⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠻⠟⠀⢀⠋⠉⠙⢷⡿⡇⠀ ⣻⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⠀⢀⣀⡾⣴⠃⠀ ⢿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⠄⣀⠠⠼⣁⠀⡱⠤⠤⠐⠁⠀⠀⣸⠋⢻⡟⠀⠀ ⠈⢧⣀⣤⣶⡄⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠖⠛⠻⣄⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡾⠋⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠈⠓⢦⣤⣤⣤⡤⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠚⢩⡅⣠⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣻⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡴⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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September 2019

DVD logo

⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⢹⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣇⠀⣠⣿⣿⠟⣽⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠃⢹⣿⣿⣶⣿⡿⠋⢰⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣿⠏ ⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣸⣟⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣻⡟⣻⣿⢻⣿⡟⣛⢻⣿⡟⣛⣿⡿⣛⣛⢻⣿⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀ ⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠷⣼⣿⣿⣼⣿⣧⣭⣼⣿⣧⣭⣿⣿⣬⡭⠾⠿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠀
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January 2021

China Salt Manufacturer and Casualarrian

twitchquotes: Hello Casualarrian, this is a your partner, china salt manufacturer talking to you. Yesterday i found a such a nice game named ＤＡＲＫ ＳＯＵＬＳ and i found it interesting. This is very casual game, as you like and i recommend you to try it out. This will make your stream views grow and our partnership will become ＷＥＬＬ ＭＥＴ
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

You have exceeded your monthly allowance of haHAA

twitchquotes: This is Comcast. You have exceeded your monthly allowance of haHAA and will pay overage fees of $20 per haHAA for the rest of this billing cycle.
twitch chat
July 2017
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