[Copypasta] The Moon isn't so great?

twitchquotes: The Moon isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw an astronomical object with such an ability and movement within the celestial plane? The Moon puts the eclipse game to another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a planet with its skill and passion for moving in front of things again. The Sun breaks records. Earth breaks records. The Moon breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
June 2019
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Jared 10 years later...

twitchquotes: Ten years later, after retiring from Dignitas, Jared quit league, settled down, and found a girl he loved. Everything was going great until one night, after an incredibly romantic dinner, she dropped to her knees and proposed to Jared. As she opened the small box in her hands, Jared gasped when he saw the stone: two diamonds. His future wife leaned up next to his ear, slipped the ring on his finger, and whispered, "Don't be a p ussy."
twitch chat
April 2016
Annie Bot

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

Give me a second guys, Dex says

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Dex says. "Gotta hit up the mailman" He turns down the volume on his bork, and immediately gives Kripp a swift kick down the stairs. As Kripp yelps loudly in pain, Dex overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this delivery!" as loudly as he can. Fey tries to calm him down, but Dex swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Dex wipes the blood off of his snout, sits back down at his ball, and resumes being a good doggy
twitch chat
January 2019
Kripp

Anime girl 3

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–โ–โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–โ–โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’
ascii art
January 2017

Weebs

Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019
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