[Copypasta] Meet the Engineer TF2

twitchquotes: Hey look buddy, I'm an engineer. That means I solve problems, not problems like "What is beauty?" Because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems, for instance: how am I going to stop some mean mother Hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous be-hind? The answer, use a gun, and if that don't work... Use more gun. Take for instance this heavy caliber tripod mounted lil' old number designed by me, built by me, and you best hope... Not pointed at you.
twitch chat
June 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⡤⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠖⠉⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⢿⠇⠀⢰⣿⣿⣍⣀⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣄⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⡄⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠈⠉⠉⢁⣄⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣠⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⡄⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣡⣦⣶⣄⠀⠈⠉⠛⠛⠻⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡻⣻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⣀⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠄⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣷ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠉⠉⠛⢻⣿⡉⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⠿⠋ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣷⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
April 2021
xQcOW

OTHER REGION COMING THROUGH

twitchquotes: OTHER REGION COMING THROUGH LULW RANDOM HEALTH PROBLEMS LULW SUPER SPECIFIC SOCIETAL ISSUE LULW EMBARASSING MOMENT IN HISTORY LULW BRING UP YET ANOTHER SPECIFIC WEIRD EVENT LULW
twitch chat
May 2019

EU vs NA

hey there buddy chum pal friend

twitchquotes: hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn snap ur neck and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do yuo want that? do wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy...
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

Game on!

twitchquotes: Hey everyone! Google employee here. Looks like you guys are having a good time Kappa. Just a friendly reminder to link your Google+ account and avoid streaming any copyrighted material. Game on!
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas, and has successfully executed her forced feminization program, converting 72% of the us male population into women, the remaining 28% either existing peacefully as femboy subs or have fled the country, if they're lucky. All references to Dr. Seuss, Mr. Potatohead, and other such martyrs and thoughtcrimes will lead to prompt and inevitable cancellation by means of Jewish space laser. All statues of white people have been torn down and replaced with statues of AOC alongside Mao Zedong and Che Guevara, and the public has thus collectively forgotten about Robert E. Lee. The constitution has its 28th amendment, codifying mandatory cock and ball torture for all penis-having citizens no less than twice a week. It is illegal to say "Merry Christmas". Heterosexual relationships are strictly forbidden. Attack Helicopter, with pronouns brr/brrs, is a gender recognized on the official list of 93. The police have been almost entirely defunded, nationally having an annual budget of $5.30, enough for a single Big Mac Combo Meal. There is a new arm of the state, namely the "rape police" whose sole duty is functionally a secret task force to ensure all consent is affirmative and enthusiastic. All citizens must pledge allegiance to the LGBTQIA+ rainbow flag and swear oaths on White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. All g*mers have been deported. Mexico is now the 53rd state, behind Puerto Rico and Washington DC. All bathrooms are gender-neutral. Marxism, the theory proposing the government do a lot of things, has become the official state ideology, including mandatory education on critical race theory beginning in pre-K. White people are second class citizens, guilty of being white, and all white people must publicly apologize on the behalf of their race as a coming-of-age ceremony at the beginning of pubescence. Facts now care about feelings. We will no longer be subjugated by AOC and her inner party, the Squad. The Culture War is not over. We will not be cancelled. We are the resista— radio static
March 2021
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