[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Fungus wojak / Shroomjak / Shrigma male

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⡃⠀⠿⠇⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⠁⠀⣰⡄⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠸⡷⠃⢀⠀⠸⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⠋⢀⣀⡀⠀⢿⣳⡄⢳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠞⠁⠀⠸⣌⣻⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⢾⢁⡞⠉⠉⠓⢦⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡴⠯⠴⠋⠈⠧⣄⣀⣀⣠⠇⠀⠀⠶⠆⠀⢲⡆⠀⠀⠨⠷⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣾⣅⢀⣠⠤⠶⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⣟⠛⠛⠛⠒⡒⠒⠒⠷⠦⢤⣀⠀⠀⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⢡⢟⣉⣀⠒⠶⠤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠈⠑⣆⠀⢷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⠀⢈⣉⣉⣉⣛⣒⣿⣿⣶⣤⠼⠗⠶⠾⣅⣀⡤⠞⣁⣤⠴⠂⠘⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⣄⠈⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣭⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢶⣋⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣶⣶⣿⣭⣥⡏⢀⣈⣈⠉⠀⠀⠐⠂⠠⠈⣏⣉⣉⣻⣶⣞⡵⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢹⠃⠻⢿⣿⠟⠀⠘⢾⣿⣿⠀⡿⠛⠛⠓⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠉⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⣴⠀⠀⣹⡄⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠈⠁⠉⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠤⠄⠀⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⡀⠀⠀
July 2021

AITA For banning my sister from my wedding since she won't follow the dress code?

Hello Reddit UWU my name is fox chan nya~ 🦊 and this September I'm getting married (wiggles tail in excitement) 😍🐈🇷🇺 I'm getting married next week to my alpha horse wolf Shadow Senpai 🐴🐺🥰. The dress code is animal themed but my sister won't do it. She's Vagen😳 and thinks it's bad (cries cutely while Mozart's Symphony No. 40 in G minor plays)🎶🎼♫🎤 (eyes turn red like demon, but not like demon) I want to not invite her 😡😤🤬😈 AITA?
September 2021

Am I The Asshole?

An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022

Apple announces an EV program

Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Obey the call of Kripp'Thuzad

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º ༽ Minions, (ง •̀_•́)ง servants, <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ soldiers of the cold dark, obey the call of ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ) Kripp'Thuzad ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ)!!!
twitch chat
March 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

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