[Copypasta] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius

twitchquotes: My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions and loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next
twitch chat
June 2019
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More Copypastas

How do I get my husband to stop going ā€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex?

How do I get my husband to stop going ā€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex? TLDR; My husband says ā€˜Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says ā€˜Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward. I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in ā€˜Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, ā€˜Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said ā€˜Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice? Edit: The problem isn’t the ā€˜Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
July 2022

Confessions

Classic

5 men 9 eyebrows 1 dream

twitchquotes: This is Gambit ą¼¼ ĀŗŁ„ĶŸĀŗą¼¼ ĀŗŁ„ĶŸĀŗ( ͔° Ķ” ͜ ͔ʖ Ķ” °)ĀŗŁ„ĶŸĀŗ ą¼½ĀŗŁ„ĶŸĀŗ ą¼½ 5 MEN 9 EYEBROWS 1 DREAM
twitch chat
March 2014

Classic

League of Legends

Hopefully the FBI can find Jack Ma

FBI set up a tip line for people to send in videos and pictures of the people who stormed the capitol yesterday... I’ve been sending them pictures of Jack Ma. Hopefully they can find him.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

haven’t done assassins in a while

twitchquotes: "alright, locket I guessā€ ResidentSleeper ā€œhaven’t done assassins in a whileā€ ResidentSleeper ā€œguess I’ll pick up this akaliā€ ResidentSleeper ā€œoh look, 6 assassinsā€ ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
July 2019

Teamfight Tactics

The ultimate tool to win any argument you're in, works even if you're losing

That's a nice argument you have, but unfortunately, I had sexual intercourse with your mother, therefore rendering any point you make null.
May 2021
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