[Copypasta] Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi

Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
July 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend

twitchquotes: TPFufun Truth be told, I'm quite proud of my house blend. To attain my flavor and fragrance, I use five different types of coffee beans. TPFufun
twitch chat
August 2017

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city?

Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city? I thought not. It's not a story the Playmobils would tell you. It's a LEGO legend. Man Lego was a Dark Lord of building, so powerful and so wise he could use the bricks to influence the constructions to create rescue helicopters… He had such a knowledge of building that he could even keep the ones he cared about from falling. The dark side of the LEGOs is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice threw him into the river in LEGO city. Ironic. He could rescue others from the river, but not himself.
December 2020

Lego City

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

do u think that yoshi gets embarrassed (Shakespearean English)

Dost thou ponder if yoshi's constitution becomes discombobulated whence eggs are excreted afore Mario's gaze? My sincere apologies if thy bristles were tussled, however I believe this to be quite amusing. And, I am curious to perview a charcoal etching of this event, if only for a rousing chuckle. I'm also perplexed whence trying to place what eldritch odor would arise. This is only for a gaff, a ruse, merriment per se, I would like to smell them.
April 2021

5Head 🍷 Oh, but of course!

twitchquotes: 5Head 🍷 Oh, but of course!
twitch chat
June 2019

Poggersception

⠄⠰⠛⠋⢉⣡⣤⣄⡉⠓⢦⣀⠙⠉⠡⠔⠒⠛⠛⠛⠶⢶⣄⠘⢿⣷⣤⡈⠻⣧ ⢀⡔⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠉⠁⡀⠐⠒⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡈⠳⢄⣹⣿⣿⣾⣿ ⣼⠁⢠⡄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⡐⠁⡀⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⡀⠈⠄⠄⣀⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⡇⠈⠛⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢉⡓⠚⠛⠛⠋⣉⣩⣤⣤⣀⠑⠤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢁⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠈⠙⠛⠋⣭⣭⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⢠⡍⠉⠉⢠⣤⣴⠚⢩⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⢴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣭⣭⣭⣥⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⣴⣶⡶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣮⣭⣝⣛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠙⣿⡄⠄⠄⢀⡤⠬⢭⣝⣒⢂⠭⣉⠻⠿⣷⣶⣦⣭⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠸⣿⡇⠄⠸⣎⣁⣾⠿⠉⢀⠇⣸⣿⣿⢆⡉⠹⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⢀⡶⠶⠶⠾⠿⠮⠭⠭⢭⣥⣿⣿⣷⢸⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⣿⡇⠄⠈⣷⠄⠄⠄⣭⣙⣹⢙⣰⡎⣿⢏⣡⣾⢏⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⢰⣿⡇⠄⠄⢿⠄⠄⠈⣿⠉⠉⣻⣿⡷⣰⣿⡿⣡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⠘⠿⠤⠤⠿⠿⠿⢤⣤⣤⡿⣃⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠘⢿⣷⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣴⣾⡿⢋⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋
June 2021

Pepe

Text-to-Speech Playing