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Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky?
twitchquotes:
(⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Alright students, how often is Kripp lucky? ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Call on me! (⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Yes little Dong? ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ Kripp is never lucky, sir! (⌐ ͡▢ ͜ʖ ͡▢) Wrong, Kripp is lucky a reasonable amount of time. Come see me after class for your punishment . ʕ⌐ ͡▢ ͜ᴥ ͡▢ʔ
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Kripp
Mario Party Superstars Bowser Eat Shit Sticker
⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⢀⣦⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢛⣿⣿⣧⣝⣻⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣴⣿⣿⡿⠀⢸⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠃⢀⣾⠟⠀⣈⣂⣀⣀⠀⣴⠞⣿⠶⠛⠛⠛⠁⠈⠻⢿⢻⣻⣿⣿⣿⠏⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣾⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣯⠀⠘⢁⣤⣾⣿⣿⠉⠙⠛⠋⠀⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣷⢹⣦⣴⣾⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⣿⣿
⣟⣋⡁⠀⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⢿⣿⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿
⠛⠿⣏⠀⢠⣈⠻⣿⣿⢱⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣤⡌⠀⠀⠛⠛⢛
⣀⠀⠀⢈⣻⣿⠿⠛⠉⠸⣿⡶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣧⡀⢠⣿⣿⣦⣝
⣿⣿⣾⡟⠉⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⢿⡇⠀⢀⣀⣀⡈⢿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠙⠻⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⢰⠄⠀⠀⠀⠛⠋⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡹⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿
⡀⠀⠀⠹⣧⠀⠀⢀⣬⣥⡤⣠⣤⡰⣿⣟⣿⣦⣶⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⢎⠹⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣰⣶⣦⡤⣠⣿⣿⡿
⣿⣷⡆⠀⣽⠇⢠⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣃⢨⢀⣿⡿⠱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⡧⠉⠀
⣿⠏⠀⣼⠏⠀⢠⠍⢀⡐⣡⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⠝⡛⠿⠟⣻⡍⠀⢩⢠⣿⣿⠃⠀⢬⣟⡻⠿⠿⠇⢿⡕⠀⢠⣶
⠁⠀⣼⠃⠀⠀⠈⠀⠠⠈⣴⠎⠀⢰⣦⡶⠇⡃⠀⠀⠈⠃⣤⣀⣿⣿⢋⣀⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡀⠘⠻
⠀⢘⣷⣤⣀⠀⠀⣴⡦⢃⣵⣶⠀⠈⠋⠁⣄⣻⣤⣶⣶⣶⣯⣽⣿⣿⡜⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣄⠸⣷⠀⠀
⠀⠈⠋⠉⠛⠷⣮⣙⢵⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣡⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠘⣛⣭⡶⠟⢣⣤
⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠈⢛⣫⡍⠀⠀⠀⣹⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⣶⠟⠋⢁⣤⣾⣿⣿
⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠉⠻⠆⠛⣿⠟⠛⢿⠟⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠔⠘⠛⠛⠻⠟⠛⠛⠛⠃⠿⠿⠓⢲⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣟⣛⠃⠃⣸⢿⡄⣀⠛⣿⠛⣃⡆⢰⣟⡛⠀⣿⣇⣀⣿⢸⡇⢘⢻⡟⢛⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣟⣉⡀⢰⡿⠾⣷⠘⡇⣿⠀⣬⡁⢠⣉⣻⡆⣿⡏⠉⣿⢸⡇⢸⢸⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠉⠁⢀⣭⣥⣧⣭⣴⣌⣃⣬⣍⣩⣄⠉⠁⠀⢉⣬⣥⣴⣬⣥⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡖⠀⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼⣿⣶⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.
I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label:
For Women.
AITA for not telling my wife about all the hitchhikers I killed in the 70s?
Back when I (68M) was a young and dumb twenty-something, I spent a few carefree years in Southern California raping, torturing, and murdering hitchhikers. I don't want any judgement from SJWs about this, please, if you didn't live in Cali in the 1970s, you wouldn't understand. It was just what we did back in those days. Eventually I grew up, got married, had three beautiful kids, and was content to just get off to my trophies and polaroids, and maybe kill the occasional drifter on special occasions.
The other day, my wife (37F) found the hidden panel in my basement wall where I keep all the old memories, and she went ballistic. I tried to calm her down, explained that, firstly, they were all dudes, so she shouldn't exactly be getting jealous. Second, they're all dead, so it's not like she's going to have to worry about me leaving her for any of them. Third, there were like three or four other guys doing the same thing around then, and they took the credit for most of my kills. I was very careful, covered my tracks, rarely finished inside them. I don't know why she's got her knickers in such a twist.
Quite frankly, I'm feeling really hurt about the whole thing. We've been together for nearly thirty years, and she's thinking about leaving me over something like this? Maybe I should have been more honest, but I was raised to see this as men's business, not something you involve your old lady in.
Am I the asshole?
AITA
Y U NO
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