[Copypasta] This guy's pasta is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's pasta is CRAZY!” ☑ “My rigatoni can't win against a linguini like that” ☑ "He NEEDED that alfredo to win" ☑ “He meatballed the only marinara that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect fettucini ☑ “There was nothing I could cook” ☑ “I cooked that al dente”
twitch chat
August 2014
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018

Please do not type in chat unless you are high ELO

twitchquotes: Please do not type in chat unless you are high ELO (silver 2 and above) FailFish Let's have a high quality chat please
twitch chat
May 2017

League of Legends

Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine

Meanwhile in Call of Duty, true gamers laugh about Battlefield's primitive physics engine. Arma was an attempt by a failing Czech developer to make Call of Duty 'more realistic'. However due to the fact that Call of Duty was already as realistic as a video game can possibly be, they panicked. They made a shameless rip-off and slapped 'military simulator' on the front. True gamers are smart enough to know this, hence why Arma averages 67 on Metacritic, whereas Call of Duty averages 98-100. Call of Duty players laugh down at players of every other game, knowing they are Call of Duty rip-offs. Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine. The world's leading video game scientists have confirmed this, so it isn't as much 'thinking' as it is 'knowing'. And Call of Duty can't possibly RIP those games off. Call of Duty was the first video game, so there wasn't anything for it to rip off.
August 2021

Call of Duty

I am... the Kripp

twitchquotes: My name is Octavian Morosan, and I am the saltiest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary vegan, but secretly, with the help of my friends at P.E.T.A. Labs, I play childrens card games and find other babies like me. I BM'd the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one salty enough to complain about going second. them. I am... The Kripp!
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp

Kappa

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November 2014

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing