[Copypasta] i have not been gifted a single sub

Saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

Weird fact: the Easter Bunny was the source of a significant amount of theological debate during the 1200's, as Catholic philosophers debated why God would create a creature in a constant state of labor (and thus suffering). The Catholic Church ultimately resolved this question by declaring that the Easter Bunny orgasmed every time it laid it an egg (which it was doing constantly). This is now codified in Canon Law (the legal code of the Catholic Church and much of Europe in the pre-modern era) and saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

April 2022

Holiday

Easter

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.

August 2021

Wreck-it Ralph

████████████████████████████████ ██████▓▓▓▓█████▓▓▓▓████▓▓▓▓█████ ████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██▓▓▓▓███████ ███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███ █████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█████ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ███▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███ █████▓▓▓▓▒▒██░░░░░░██▒▒▓▓▓▓█████ ███▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒██▓▓██▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓███ █▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒────▒▒────▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▓▓█ ███░░▒▒▓▓░░──██░▒██──░░▓▓▒▒░░███ ███░░░░▓▓░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░▓▓░░░░███ ███████░░░░░░▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░███████ ███████░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░███████ █████░░░░██▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀██░░░░█████ █████░░████▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄████░░█████ █████░░██████████████████░░█████ █████░░██▒▒██▓▓▓▓▓▓██▒▒██░░█████ █████░░██▓█▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀█▓██░░█████ █████░░████▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄████░░█████ ███████░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░███████ █████████▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█████████ ████████████████████████████████

ascii art

September 2021

There was a bug in the toilet

twitchquotes: WHEN I SAT DOWN ⬇️ TO PEE 🧘‍♂️💦 THERE WAS A BUG 🐞 IN THE TOILET 🚽 BUT I THOUGHT 💭 IT WAS DROWNED 🌊👻 ❓❔❓❔ N WHEN I GOT UP ⬆️ ‼️IT WASN'T ❌ THERE

IM SOBBING 😭 IS IT IN MY FUCKING 🍆 BUTTHOLE 🍑⭕ WHERE IS IT⁉️⁉️⁉️

twitch chat

July 2020

CTRL + W to activate mod status

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— imGlitch

The broadcaster of this channel has promoted you to mod status. Please press the key combo CTRL + W on your keyboard to activate this.————————————————————————

twitch chat

May 2019

[Copypasta] i have not been gifted a single sub

Saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

Holiday

Easter

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

Wreck-it Ralph

There was a bug in the toilet

CTRL + W to activate mod status

Classic

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