twitchquotes:
Copy pasters are such idiots. Imagine being so dumb you just CTRL + C what other people write? Wasting oxygen for real. Try an original thought please.
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
America as a nation can be defined as a single word
"America as a nation can be defined as a single word: Iwasinthefootasdkjhasjckabcxdqiweywqfootuidhaksb... excuse me, I was in the foothills of the Himalayas with Xi Jinping, traveling with him, traveled 17,000 miles when I was Vice President. I don't know that for a fact."
- Joe Biden
Joe Biden
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
Only way I can feel safe
twitchquotes:
When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Transcript of Will Smith and his wife
Jada: Are you going to let him speak about me like that?
Will: What, it was funny, you were terrible in G.I. Jane
J: I wasn't in G.I. Jane, Will
W: Oh, then why did he say that?
J: It was a joke about my hair!!
W: Girl, you ain't got no hair
J: THATS THE POINT WILL!!
W: Ohh. ohhhh. OH Hell No!!
Will Smith Slap
Holy Champion: how many fingers do you see?
twitchquotes:
╭∩╮( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮ How many fingers do you see? ╭∩╮ ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
twitch chat
Kibler