[Copypasta] Leave the competition to the the competitors

twitchquotes: WHY in the FUCK do you PLEBS roll in here and think you can backseat game the GREAT [insert streamer name]. He is a god who floats in your sea of wrong on his ship of right. His plays are FLAWLESS and every loss he takes is pure, unadultared, rng, bullshit. Get your tiny minds out of here and go watch something more casual!! Leave the competition to the the competitors. [insert streamer name] god has essential work to do.
twitch chat
April 2020
I used to be a real ad
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AITA for not going to my friend’s funeral home if he isn’t coming to mine?

So me (69m) and my friend (69m) were at waffle house (7300 Innerplan Dr, North Little Rock, Arkansas 72113-7645, US) and were discussing funerals (6-9k). I mentioned that since I will be attending his funeral (approx. 2032) that it would be impudent for him not to turn up to mine (approx. 2036). Long story short, this lead for him to swing a naughty haymaker (right) directly aiming for my jaw when I rapidly dodged and gave the cheeky cunt a swift uppercut (broken nose). He is now hospitalized (critical condition) and I am now currently evading law enforcement (on foot). My family (69f wife, 54m son, 69f wife) have been trying to contact me but I keep telling them if I ever see that punk again, I will give him a little combo (right hook, left hook, headbutt then roundhouse kick). If he is still moving I will stomp on his head until he is a little red smear on the bottom of my boot (black timberlands). I know I’m right but I feel as if I may have overreacted a tiny bit (not too much) AITA?
November 2019

Am I The Asshole?

Ultra EDM dance

twitchquotes: ┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-) ┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-) ┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)┛┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-) ┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›β”—(-_- )β”“β”—(-_-)┛┏(-_-) ┏(-_-)┓┏(-_-)β”›
twitch chat
March 2016
Ultra

They tried circumcising me but my foreskin only grew back stronger

They tried circumcising me but my foreskin only grew back stronger. Since then I have been circumcised every 6 months. My foreskin is now stronger than steel. When I am in danger, I pull it over my body like an outer shell. It is fully bulletproof, fireproof, waterproof and extremely lightweight. I have plans to sell it as a highly rare, resistant material and make millions. Brigades will be made out of beams of foreskin, and police units will wear foreskin vests.
August 2021

MaSsan is an anagram for Assman

twitchquotes: ΰΌΌ β—” ΝœΚ– β—” ΰΌ½ MaSsan is an anagram for Assman ΰΌΌ β—” ΝœΚ– β—” ΰΌ½ ΰΌΌ β—” ΝœΚ– β—” ΰΌ½ MaSsan is an anagram for Assman ΰΌΌ β—” ΝœΚ– β—” ΰΌ½
twitch chat
October 2015
MaSsanSC

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twitch chat
December 2017

Net Neutrality

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