[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Motherโ€™s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming Iโ€™ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didnโ€™t even answer (and he loves dessert)
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May 2020
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โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–„โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–€โ– โ–โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ– โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ– โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–„โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€ โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–€โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–„โ–ˆโ–โ–โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Have you considered playing Raid Shadow Legends

twitchquotes: (name). You always play (game). Have you considered playing a turn base MMORPG Raid Shadow Legends. With the code TtS you'll get 50,000 silver and a free epic champion as part of the new player program to start your journey! Good luck and I'll see you there!
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June 2021

sellout

Happy 420 emoji copypasta

April 2021

VapeNation

Emoji Pasta

A Reddit comment summarized and compressed

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox. Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger
August 2021

A single Dongerbill can save a life

twitchquotes: Hello, I'm Sarah McLanchdong. Every day millions of poor, helpless dongers go unraised everyday. Dongers that are abused and negated, like this poor fellow เผผ โ–€ฬฟ ฬฟ ู„อŸเบˆ เผฝ. For just one Dongerbill [ฬฒ$ฬฒ(ฬฒ อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐฬฒ)ฬฒ$ฬฒ] a day we can help save these forgotten dongers (โ—‰_โ˜ข) เผผ อยฐส–เฒ  เผฝ ( อกยฐู„อœ ยบ) from a life time of being lowered. Your there only hope, because just a minute of your time and a single Dongerbill [ฬฒ$ฬฒ(ฬฒ อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐฬฒ)ฬฒ$ฬฒ] can save a life.
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November 2014

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