[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Mother’s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming I’ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didn’t even answer (and he loves dessert)
twitch chat
May 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.” She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Copy tagliatelli vs Copy pasta

twitchquotes: This is a campaign from Tagliatelli. We have been noticing sales drops as a result of people's choice of regular pasta rather than the much more tasty tagliatelli. Would you all please stop spreading copy pasta and start copy tagliatelli?
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

My husband said I have "boy pussy."

My husband said I have "boy pussy." I am a biological woman and a female. I haven't spoken to him since. For context we were having sex, and at some point with his eyes closed he moaned "yeah that boy pussy..." and then stopped, realising he spoke out loud. I'd feel better if he mentioned another woman because we're (somewhat) open but I'm pretty sure he's bisexual and instead of speaking to me about it, fantasizes about me being a twink.
May 2022

Tyler1 is the epitome of optimized-intellect

twitchquotes: Tyler1 is the epitome of optimized-intellect, whom of which specializes in quantum-physics and mathematics, as well as the profoundly skill-consuming game, League of Legends. The motives that Tyler1 possesses stem from his humble beginnings of a hard-stuck D5 Draven main, eventually however climbing the ranks to challenger. Though this quest was not easy, Tyler1 discovered rudimentary theorems and postulates found in today’s mathematical studies.. BigBrother
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

-_- emoji (expressionless face)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣻⣫⢯⣗⣗⣗⣗⣗⡷⡽⣝⡯⣟⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⢝⣞⣗⢷⡽⣽⣺⣳⢯⣾⣺⡽⣽⣳⢯⢯⢯⢯⢞⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢿⣕⡯⣟⣞⡾⣽⢽⣳⣟⣾⣻⣞⣷⣻⣽⣞⣯⢿⡽⣽⢽⢽⢵⣻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢯⣳⣳⢽⣳⢯⡯⣿⣽⣻⡾⣷⢿⣞⣿⣞⣷⣟⣾⢯⣯⢷⣻⡽⣳⢧⡻⣿⣿ ⣿⣏⣗⢷⢽⡽⣞⣯⣿⣳⢟⣷⢿⣻⣽⣟⣾⣻⣾⣻⢾⢿⣞⣯⣷⣻⢽⣳⣝⣝⣿ ⣿⣺⣪⢿⢽⡽⣯⢷⡯⢐⠄⠄⣻⣟⣷⢿⣽⣻⡞⠠⡂⠄⢻⣗⣷⢯⣟⣞⡮⣖⣿ ⣿⡺⣺⢽⢯⣻⣽⢯⣧⠐⠐⡀⣺⣽⣾⢿⣽⣯⣇⢐⠠⠈⣼⣟⣾⣻⣺⣵⡻⡮⣿ ⣿⡺⡽⡽⡯⣷⣻⣻⣽⣾⣲⢾⣽⢷⣟⣿⣳⣯⡿⣶⢶⣽⣻⣾⣳⡯⣷⡳⣯⡳⣻ ⣿⡺⣝⡯⡿⡽⣞⣯⣷⢿⣽⢿⣽⢿⣽⢷⣟⣷⢿⣻⡿⣽⢷⣻⢾⣽⣳⢯⣗⢝⣿ ⣿⣝⣞⡽⡽⡯⣟⣷⠉⡁⠅⠡⠁⠅⠡⠁⠅⠡⢉⠨⠈⠌⡉⣿⢽⣞⣞⣗⡗⣽⣿ ⣿⣿⡼⣺⢽⢯⣟⣞⡷⡶⡾⡶⣷⢾⡶⣷⢾⣶⢶⣶⢷⡶⡾⣽⢽⣺⢞⡞⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣮⢯⣳⡳⡯⡯⣟⣟⣯⢿⡽⣯⣟⣿⣺⡯⣯⡯⣯⢿⢽⢽⡺⡹⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣧⡫⡯⡯⣗⣟⡾⣽⢽⣳⢯⢾⣺⢽⣳⢯⢯⢯⢏⢇⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣽⣕⡳⡫⣗⢟⢾⣝⢯⢯⢻⢪⡫⣽⣼⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
August 2021
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing