[Copypasta] YEP COCK is modern expression of bacchic spirit

twitchquotes: Those plebs simply dont get it, all those who oppose YEP COCK are nothing more than a band of simpletons. YEP COCK is modern expression of bacchic spirit. YEP COCKER entering a chat is like priest of Dionysus Enorches, wielding a thyris and bearing wreath of grapevine. As the elder priest leading cultists in state of bacchic haze to sacred Eleusis YEP COCKER announces the unbridled joy of YEP COCKERY by the simple sign of YEP COCK which lets everyone forget of their quotidian struggles.
twitch chat
June 2020
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More Copypastas

RIP Joe the Spider

I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it. Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some β€œdude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house. Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust. Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said β€œyou’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask β€œfor what?” He says β€œI just killed a big ass spider for you”. I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled β€œYOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy. My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house. I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure. RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
May 2022

DickButt

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August 2015

National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Pie, I am from the NAAUP (National Association for the Advancement of Urgot Players) and myself and my organization has taken a notice to you never playing Urgot. We feel this is highly discriminatory and would ask that you rectify this by playing Urgot immediately. Thank you. Kappa
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Scraggly vegan is the only one left

twitchquotes: BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. β€œI don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

My husband is the moderator for a few different subreddits, and he genuinely thinks it’s a job

my husband refuses to look for a job even though I think it would be good for him (And we could use the additional income), but he just says he’s, β€œgot too much on his plate already”. That being monitoring these stupid subreddits. And Everytime I bring it up he claims what he’s doing is unpaid labor similar to that of a homemaker. But he doesn’t clean or cook or do any of that the way he used to. He just monitors his stupid subreddits. I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I want to leave him because I believe I may not be able to reach him.
November 2021

Reddit

MODS

Text-to-Speech Playing