[Copypasta] How to have sex and still be a virgin

You see if you have sex with another virgin you're therefore taking their virginity and they are taking your virginity so it's a win-win and you can still use Reddit
March 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease. You're a doctor you just got the test results of the patient it's just as you feared it's fatal, your patient has ligma you're crying but you can't stop laughing you know you have to tell your patient that he has ligma but you can't keep a straight face you have to go out therr and tell your patient that he has only three days left to live and that there's no cure no hope not even enough time for him to finish his bucket list or find love or get the life he's always wanted he started making progress, he was doing well, his future had high hopes but he has a fatal case of ligma and you can't keep a straight face you walk out to your patient, "s-sir," you say through snickers "yes doctor? what are my test results?" your patient replies "I-I'm very sorry to say but," you respond as your sentence gets interrupted by a loud snort. "it's f-f-atal." you can't hold your laughs and you let out a bit of laughter "Is this some kind of joke? are you some sadistic creep? why the fuck are you laughing" the patient shouts out you "you h-have a fatal case of l-l-ligma," you can't hold it in anymore, you burst out laughing, you're rolling on the floor, tears in your eyes, you pee yourself a little "what the fuck is wrong with you? you're horrible! fuck you! go to hell!" your patient replies, with a face of horror, disgust, anger and sadness. he starts to cry. he's shaking you scream at the top of your lungs, "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LIGMA BALLS!" you can't stop laughing and shouting, over and over again you repeat "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS!" your patient flees, he runs as fast as he can soon the police come, they handcuff you and put you in the back of a police car. you don't know what's going to happen to you now, but you know it won't be good
August 2021

Fabulous

βŠ‚_ヽ γ€€ οΌΌοΌΌ οΌΏ γ€€γ€€ οΌΌ(γ€€β€’_β€’) F γ€€γ€€γ€€ <γ€€βŒ’γƒ½ A γ€€γ€€γ€€/ γ€€ へ\ B γ€€γ€€ /γ€€γ€€/γ€€οΌΌοΌΌ U γ€€γ€€ οΎšγ€€γƒŽγ€€γ€€ ヽ_぀ L γ€€γ€€/γ€€/ O γ€€ /γ€€/| U γ€€(γ€€(ヽ S γ€€|γ€€|、\ γ€€| δΈΏ οΌΌ βŒ’) γ€€| |γ€€γ€€) / `γƒŽ )γ€€γ€€LοΎ‰ (_/
December 2020

Thijs please remove your shirt immediately

twitchquotes: Hello @Thijs this is the Belastingdienst - the Tax and Customs Administration of the Netherlands. We have founds some discrepancies in your tax return. In order to correct your mistakes and avoid getting a fine - please remove your shirt immediately. Thank you for your cooperation.
twitch chat
June 2019
Thijs

The default Fortnite dance is truly a masterpiece

twitchquotes: The default dance is truly a masterpiece. Never, in all of history, has such an artistic masterpiece ever been created. The choreography is possibly the most beautiful sight ever beheld by the human eye. The sharp sound of the SLAP when the player’s hands collide perfectly with the beat of the song sends a bone chilling shiver down my spine, every single time I hear it. I find my self watching my in-game avatar performing this phenomenal dance ritual for hours on end.
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

Chugga Chugga

twitchquotes: α••β”Œβ—•α—œβ—•β”α•— CHUGGA CHUGGA! α••β”Œβ—•α—œβ—•β”α•—
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing