Sorry! Something wrong happened behind the scenes. Refresh and try again.
[Copypasta]How to have sex and still be a virgin
You see if you have sex with another virgin you're therefore taking their virginity and they are taking your virginity so it's a win-win and you can still use Reddit
You see if you have sex with another virgin you're therefore taking their virginity and they are taking your virginity so it's a win-win and you can still use Reddit
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
The year is 2035, you buy g fuel with doge coin
The year is 2035, you enter your local 7/11 to buy yourself a g fuel before your shift in the local crypto mine. The android working the counter says they only accept doge coin. You pull out your phone, draw a stick man in less than five seconds on a yellow back ground and then sell it as an NFT. From the sell you make 6 doge coin, about 5 million dollars in old world money. You go to buy the drink only to find out that from the time you closed your phone to the time you talked to the cashier the coins had dropped in value to only 3 dollars per coin and you now owe at least 10 doge coin to the robot for the gamer fuel. You leave the store, frustrated, and drive off in your Tesla
The year is 2035, you enter your local 7/11 to buy yourself a g fuel before your shift in the local crypto mine. The android working the counter says they only accept doge coin. You pull out your phone, draw a stick man in less than five seconds on a yellow back ground and then sell it as an NFT. From the sell you make 6 doge coin, about 5 million dollars in old world money. You go to buy the drink only to find out that from the time you closed your phone to the time you talked to the cashier the coins had dropped in value to only 3 dollars per coin and you now owe at least 10 doge coin to the robot for the gamer fuel. You leave the store, frustrated, and drive off in your Tesla
As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some.
How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully.
āAre you coming to bed?ā your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youāll stop soon, though. āSoon!ā you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps.
The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltāthe alternation feature brokenāon red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyāre bleeding. Like your calls.
After a timeāhours?āyou realize youāre sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some.
How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully.
āAre you coming to bed?ā your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. Youāll stop soon, though. āSoon!ā you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps.
The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they haltāthe alternation feature brokenāon red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like theyāre bleeding. Like your calls.
After a timeāhours?āyou realize youāre sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
Yeah I'm a virgin, so what?
Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
Yeah I'm a virgin, so what? I'm waiting for the "right one", there's nothing wrong with that. Just because I'm 36 doesn't make it "weird" or make me a "loser". I have standards. I'm not going to give away my state of chastity to some bar/club "whore"; that's just not the kind of guy I am. I require a REAL women that will hold and care for me gently, and who can, above all else, love me for who I am. Once I find that person, I'll happily donate my virginity away. Until then, I am fine being a virgin. Besides, I have a fleshlight, so it's not like I don't know how it feels anyway. Maybe one day you immature keyboard cretins will understand that life isn't about just having sex for the accomplishment, it's about love and finding the "one" to share that experience with.
I want to fuck the Samsung girl
Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad Iāve done nothing but think about her. I canāt go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. Iāve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I canāt stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I canāt complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I canāt live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as Iāll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this Iāve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldnāt want it any other way.
Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad Iāve done nothing but think about her. I canāt go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. Iāve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I canāt stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I canāt complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I canāt live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as Iāll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this Iāve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldnāt want it any other way.