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Is buttcheeks one word, or shall I spread them apart?
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I used to be a real ad
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Trump nuclear ramble
Look, having nuclearâmy uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart âyou know, if youâre a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say Iâm one of the smartest people anywhere in the worldâitâs true!âbut when youâre a conservative Republican they tryâoh, do they do a numberâthatâs why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortuneâyou know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because weâre a little disadvantagedâbut you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers meâit would have been so easy, and itâs not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of whatâs going to happen and he was rightâwho would have thought?), but when you look at whatâs going on with the four prisonersânow it used to be three, now itâs fourâbut when it was three and even now, I would have said itâs all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they donât, they havenât figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, itâs gonna take them about another 150 yearsâbut the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.
Donald Trump
This is the Vegan Police
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(â̿Ě̯âĚż Ěż) This is the Vegan Police. We have reason to suspect the food you just ate was not entirely Vegan. Please prepare a stool sample promptly. (â̿Ě̯âĚż Ěż)
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Kripp
Game on!
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Hey everyone! Google employee here. Looks like you guys are having a good time Kappa. Just a friendly reminder to link your Google+ account and avoid streaming any copyrighted material. Game on!
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imaqtpie
I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday
Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
I need Tesla to go $3k eoy
Ran out of condoms and told my gf I'm a pull out king. Went in raw and found out I'm king of shit. She now preggo and I need Tesla to go $3,000 eoy.