[Copypasta] The LGBTQ future

twitchquotes: The year is 2040. The LGBTQ party has taken over the whole world. Being heterosexual is illegal. At age 14, everyone is forced by law to change to another one of the 666 different genders. The last gamers hide in the sewers, eating rats and enjoying decade-old videogames; the last ones without identity politics woven directly in the code. Their last hope: leaving edgy comments in reviews on Steam.
twitch chat
July 2020
I used to be a real ad
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4House

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣀⡄⡀⠙⠿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡁⠄⡓⡩⠐⠚⠲⣈⡢⣈⠛⢷⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠊⣴⠖⠂⣠⣶⣷⣄⡉⠸⠧⡵⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⡁⠐⢥⡚⠑⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠉⣳⡀⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠉⠠⣂⠔⠌⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠣⠍⣶⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿ ⡂⢄⠒⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠒⡃⢀⠄⠙ ⠔⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠈⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠳⠄⠈⠉⠤⢳ ⣄⣤⣤⠘⠛⠛⠓⠄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⡶⠿⠿⣷⣶⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢠⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⣸⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⣯⣀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣆⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
February 2019

Darth Bearish the Regarded

Did you ever hear the tragedy of "Darth Bearish the Regarded"? I thought not. It’s not a story any bull would tell you. It’s an ancient Bear legend. Darth Bearish was a Dark Lord of the Bears, so well capitalized and so regarded he could use Leverage to influence gamma to create profits… He had such a knowledge of the dark side of Leverage that he could even keep other traders he cared about from being margin called. But the dark side of Leverage is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be... unnatural. He became so bearish… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his positions, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice reversed his positions in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from bankruptcy, but not himself!
June 2022

Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise

WallStreetBets

Chemical Vegan

twitchquotes: Sugar! PJSugar Spice! PJSalt And everything nice! OhMyDog CoolCat KappaPride These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect streamer. But Professor Reynad accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction - Chemical Vegan! Thus, the Kripp was born! BabyRage
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle

twitchquotes: Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle. Long ago, the four mispronounced unit names lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Twitch Chat Nation attacked. Only the DogDog, master of all pepega names , could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished.
twitch chat
August 2019
dogdog

Teamfight Tactics

Brofist straight in your pepperonis

twitchquotes: Hᴇʏ Kʀɪᴘᴘ, I ᴡᴀs ᴊᴜsᴛ ɢʀᴏᴜɴᴅᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ. Mʏ ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛs sᴀᴡ ʏᴏᴜʀ "ʙʀᴏғɪsᴛ" ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴀᴛ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴜᴘ, ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴡ I ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴀɴʏᴍᴏʀᴇ. Iғ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʟɪғᴇ, I'ʟʟ ɢɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀ ʙʀᴏғɪsᴛ sᴛʀᴀɪɢʜᴛ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪs. Tʜᴀɴᴋs ғᴏʀ ʀᴜɪɴɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʟɪғᴇ, ᴀssʜᴏʟᴇ.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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