[Copypasta] Don't feel bad, I'm just better that you

twitchquotes: Don't feel bad, I'm just better that you. Every morning I wake up and wash my adderall down with GFUEL™️, I have a python script that uploads my gameplay directly to reddit and I have amassed over 3 million karma. I only have TTV in my name ironically but also I have a stream PogChamp. If my ping were lower I would literally never lose, my 80% headshot percentage (op included) always carries my team. Let's be honest LUL you will probably never be on my level because of my insane natural talent.
twitch chat
August 2020
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More Copypastas

why would you NOT immediately tell everyone who killed you?

twitchquotes: So uh. If you're playing Among Us. On a voice call. And you're killed... why would you NOT immediately tell everyone who killed you? Isn't the goal to win if you're crew? Like if you're not gonna tell people on the voice call, why keep doing tasks? What's the point of using the voice comms at all? You're still in it when "dead". To me if a fucking person doesn't use it when they're dead they're throwing. I'd 100% tell my team who killed me if I was killed. The point is for the crew to find out who the impostor is. If you're part of the crew, you should be telling them if you know. If you're not going to do that, you're literally int'ing and throwing. So then why bother doing tasks if you don't want to win? End discussion.
twitch chat
September 2020

Among Us / Amogus

Kripp should change his name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life Incorporated©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Deadpool dabbing

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡨⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠄⠀⠄⢰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣔⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣶⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣦⡀⢰⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣧⡄⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠤⠤⢤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣶⡇⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⣠⣭⣭⣭⠝⠋⠉⠃⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣼⡿⢿⣿⣿⡇⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠾⠰⠶⢤⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⣼⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣿⠀⣰⣿⣿⡇⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠⣷⣄⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠈⠑⠲⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠈⠻⠟⠛⠛⠿⠿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢄⠀⠂⠄⠂⠀⠀⠀⣶⣶⣶⣶⠀⠀⠈⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠁⠙⠛⣿⣿⠤⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⠿⠃⠤⠀⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢍⠀⣀⠀⠈⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢃⣥⣌⡀⠄⠀⠀⠛⠛⠗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⢰⣿⣿⣾⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢮⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠣⣸⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠠⠀⠀⠊⠍⠍⠀⠀⠰⣄⣀⡀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣤⣖⣰⠋⠁⠒⠒⢦⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢸⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⢨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀
January 2021

Valorant fanfic

twitchquotes: "Your aim is insane." Steel said, as he slipped his feminine hand into Hiko's pants and smirked. "Are you trying to spray me?" protests Hiko, as Steel blushes, the boyish figure undressed before Hiko. "Weak ass eco play, Steel." The two kissed, deeply and passionately, and afterwards Hiko dropped his Sova arrow into Steel's open bombsite.
twitch chat
October 2021
Hiko

Valorant

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Text-to-Speech Playing