[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Trump nuclear ramble

Look, having nuclear—my uncle was a great professor and scientist and engineer, Dr. John Trump at MIT; good genes, very good genes, OK, very smart, the Wharton School of Finance, very good, very smart —you know, if you’re a conservative Republican, if I were a liberal, if, like, OK, if I ran as a liberal Democrat, they would say I’m one of the smartest people anywhere in the world—it’s true!—but when you’re a conservative Republican they try—oh, do they do a number—that’s why I always start off: Went to Wharton, was a good student, went there, went there, did this, built a fortune—you know I have to give my like credentials all the time, because we’re a little disadvantaged—but you look at the nuclear deal, the thing that really bothers me—it would have been so easy, and it’s not as important as these lives are (nuclear is powerful; my uncle explained that to me many, many years ago, the power and that was 35 years ago; he would explain the power of what’s going to happen and he was right—who would have thought?), but when you look at what’s going on with the four prisoners—now it used to be three, now it’s four—but when it was three and even now, I would have said it’s all in the messenger; fellas, and it is fellas because, you know, they don’t, they haven’t figured that the women are smarter right now than the men, so, you know, it’s gonna take them about another 150 years—but the Persians are great negotiators, the Iranians are great negotiators, so, and they, they just killed, they just killed us.
September 2021

Donald Trump

i just love typing in chat K A P P A

twitchquotes: i just love typing in chat K A P P A it makes me feel so safe and good inside, its almost like eating Fruit Loops(TM) with sum good ass milk watching Dexter's Laboratory (Cartoon Network back when it was good) on a Sunday Morning back when my parents were still together, so I will now do it: Kappa
twitch chat
August 2019

Kripp paints and is one off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But it’s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. click He forgot to buy bullets. “One off lethal,” Rania sobs.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

forsenStein

⡄⢿⣿⣿⠏⣼⣿⡇⣴⣿⡆⣿⢰⣿⢀⣾⡇⢀⣿⣿⠄⣠⣿⠄⣼⢟⣴⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣦⣛⡫⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣼⢯⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁ ⠟⠟⡠⢤⣀⡀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⡀ ⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣌⣱⢦⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣹⠿⠿⣫⣿⠁ ⣤⣤⣸⢟⣉⡙⢻⠦⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣯⣶⣆⣀⣠⣤⣄⣀⣈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣴ ⣿⣿⣬⡿⢦⣤⠿⡛⢤⠄⣿⣿⣣⣼⡿⠟⢁⡀⡀⠄⠉⠛⠿⠿⡆⣦⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⣰⡟⣸⣿⢡⣯⣍⣉⢭⣍⡳⠤⠴⢆⣤⢀⣿⡭⠍⠟⡫⢙⡿ ⣿⣿⣿⣥⣤⣾⣿⢏⣴⣿⣿⡎⣯⣽⣭⣻⣦⣩⣈⠭⠿⢻⠯⣊⣴⠭⣵⣿⣶⣶ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣫⠸⠿⣿⠏⣈⣭⣹⣯⣷⣟⣻⡽⣿⣾⣽⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⣼⠟⠋⠁⠒⠻⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⢺⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣛⣥⠄⠒⣒⣒⣒⠓⠒⠚⣻⣟⠲⣤⠄⢹⣮⣙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⡳⢭⡭⢿⣽⠛⠙⠧⢭⣤⡤⢽⣦⣿⣿⣷⡝⠛⠛⠉⠄⣰⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡿⣿⣿⣶⡍⠉⠋⠛⣛⣛⣛⣭⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣣⠄⢠⣶⣾⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠉⠙⣛⣯⣾⣿⣶⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄ ⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡋⠉⠄⠄⠘⢿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

NA LOST TO CORONA

twitchquotes: NA LOST TO CORONA LUL NA LOST TO POLICE BRUTALITY LUL NA LCS IS SO BAD LUL NA PRODUCTION IS THE WORST LUL NA USING TEETH TO DEFEND THEMSELVES LUL
twitch chat
July 2020

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing