[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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March 2016

find yourself a man that respects you

twitchquotes: Poor [female streamer name here], she always has to deal with these idiots. if I was her boyfriend she would get treated like the queen she is. I would never embarass her especially not in front of other people. This is disgusting. [female streamer name here] if you are reading this just get away from these morons and find yourself a man that respects you.
twitch chat
October 2020

Simps

Finally beat the first boss Honker

twitchquotes: Hi Kripparrian. For 2 weeks I was stuck in Hearthstone. I nearly gave up on it, however, after watching your stream and learning so much, I decided to buy 40 packs and make a new deck. Lo and behold after my 7th game I finally defeated the first boss Honker. Thank you Kripparrian.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Eating chicken wings beside Tenz

twitchquotes: one time i was eating chicken wings beside tenz at a pub in canada, and he is wearing white sweatpants and the black and red SEN jersey and i was eating a flat and i took a bite out of it and the bone popped out and flip up in the air, and i swore to god that time slow down and i was like "omg holy shit, somebody stop this", i couldnt react whilst watching the bone spinning around and then the chicken wing drops but tenz moves his leg away while the bone was split-second away from touching his white sweatpants and i look dead in his eyes and said "omg dude, im so sorry" and tenz that totally silence all the time while enjoying his borovička look over towards me and said "i knew it would happen" then look away, stood up and walk off, i never been so awe in my life and then i knew this guy is and will be a great valorant player, this guy is cold as fuck like his in-game name and he is fast as hell its how he dodges the chicken wing bone and its how he fucked 100t balls deep while keeping his composure, its no coincidence, im telling you its all interconnected because what kind of person you're in real life, translated to how you are as a player in valorant.
twitch chat
June 2021
TenZ

Valorant

Artosis the Great

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian! This is your lord and saviour, Artosis the Great! I have boarded my private jet to Greecerino to meet you and your lovely wiferino Rania. See you soon! Much loverino, please no dan marino gran torino
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing