[Copypasta] Incel Revolutionary Party

twitchquotes: I am going to start a new party called "Incel Revolutionary Party" or "IRP". Almost all women will be taken into concentration camps and they get a handpicked incel boyfriend. The uglier the incel is, the better looking the girl is. Incels that are good looking will only get the fattest and ugliest girlfriends. Non-incels (infidels) will be taken into conversion camps and they will be forced to eat junk food, game all day, never go outside, and never work out. They will be converted to incels. Non-incel women that are against the forced girlfriend laws will also be converted into "incel-allies" by watching state-sponsored propaganda videos that are all about how sad incels are and how much they need girlfriends. There will also be some Chads, Brads and Tyrones that will not be converted into incels because the women who are incels (femcels) will not have to be a forced girlfriend. They will get a free boyfriend. If the chosen chads, brads and tyrones are against the laws, they will also be forced to watch propaganda videos about sad femcels are.
twitch chat
November 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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January 2021

Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019

Professor Utonium

██████████████████████ ██████████████████████ █░░██████████████░░░██ █░░░░██████████░░░░███ █░░░░░░██████░░░░░████ █░░░░░░░███░░░░░░█████ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░████ ██████░░░███████░░░███ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░██ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░███ █░▄▀▀███░░▄▀▀██▄░░░░░░░█ █░█─████░░█─████░░░░░░░█ █░█▄████░░█▄████░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░███ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░███░░░█░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░█░░█░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░█░█░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░██░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ██████████░░░░░░░░████ ───────█─██░░░░░░██──█ ───────█──███░░███───█ ───────█────████─────█ ───────█─────██──────█
September 2021

Our Greatest Gratitude for Your Invaluable Advice

twitchquotes: On behalf of the streamer and whole chat I would like to extend our greatest gratitude for your invaluable advice for this hardstuck challenger player, since he is never able to make proper itemization choices on his own! Your participation in making this channel and streamers game better, will never be forgotten!
twitch chat
May 2022

League of Legends

Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. Can you take it easy with your complaints about Flamestrike? My friend is a developer at Blizzard and he invented Flamestrike. He has been getting spam letters in the mail threatening to "brofist" him. These spammers claim to be "insane" and "crazy" and "have exactly what they need to beat him." I am worried for him, please help. Thanks man.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing