[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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You didn't ask? (response to Who Asked?)

You didn't ask? That's amazing, are you a dictator? A god? The most important person in the world? No? Then why would you say that like it matters? "I come out as a homosexual, this is really hard for me and I hope you respect that." "Did I ask?" no, you did not ask, we couldn't care less if you asked, you are nothing compared to the universe. Do you think your opinion holds a higher meaning than anyone else's? You could've said anything, something creative, even an ok or you not saying a word would be better than the phrase "Did I ask?" we get it, you never asked, but did anyone ask about you asking? Even if you said that you traveled the world to find out who asked, who asked you to do that? You didn't ask for their opinion, but nobody asked if you care at all. You aren't creative or smart. Even a caveman grunts and ooga boogas would be better than that phrase. Now stop pretending to be a god and go back to school to learn how to respect people
November 2021

Who Asked?

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
June 2017

I sexually Identify as

Frog of Ice

twitchquotes: Ａｎｄ ｔｈｅｎ ｆｒｏｍ ｔｈｅ ｃｌｏｕｄｓ ｏｆ ｃｙｂｅｒ ｓｐａｃｅ， ａ ｃｈｉｌｌ ｗｉｎｄ ｂｌｅｗ ｕｐｏｎ ａ ｍｅｒｅ Ｐａｓｔｅｒ ｐｌｅｂ， ｉｔ ｗａｓ ｔｈｅ ｆｒｏｇ ｏｆ ｉｃｅ， ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｕｎｖｅｉｌｅｄ ｕｐｏｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ． ｔｈｅ ｒｅｖｅｌａｔｉｏｎｓ ｆｏｒｅｔｏｌｄ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｐａｔｃｈ， ａ ｓａｖｉｏｒ． ａ ｍｅｓｓｉａｈ， ｔｈｅ ｒｉｓｅ ｏｆ ａ ｎｅｗ ｈｅｒｏ ａｎｄ ｔｈｅ ｄｏｗｎｆａｌｌ ｏｆ ｏｔｈｅｒｓ． Ｔｈｅ ｍｅｒｅ ｐｌｅｂ＇ｓ ｆｅｅｔ ｎｅａｒｌｙ ｃｏｌｌａｐｓｅｄ ｕｎｄｅｒ ｈｉｍ ａｓ ｈｅ ｗａｓ ｔｈｕｎｄｅｒｓｔｒｕｃｋ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ ｋｎｏｗｌｅｄｇｅ ａｎｄ ｈｅ ｒａｎ ｗｉｔｈ ｗｈａｔ ｅｖｅｒ ｂｒｅａｔｈ ｗａｓ ｗｉｔｈｉｎ ｈｉｍ ｔｏ ｓｐｒｅａｄ ｔｈｅ ｇｏｏｄ ｎｅｗｓ．
twitch chat
April 2015
SingSing

Hello Forsen, I am a 32 year old Ecuadorian national

twitchquotes: Hello Forsen I am a 32 year old Ecuadorian national who is stuck in the US after Reynad refused to pay my airfare home. I need you and your stream to please help me get home to my wife and kid it has been 1 year since my departure and I very much would like to see them again. Kappa
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Tanner's life continues its downward spiral

twitchquotes: After his shift at McDonald's, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, waiting for Kripp's stream to begin. As soon as Kripp's face appears, he begins one of his tirades, insulting and mocking Kripp, the happily-married, multi-millionaire video game streaming sensation. "That'll show him", Tanner mutters to himself, as his life continues its downward spiral.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Tanner from High School

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