[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

when were you when john lenin dies

twitchquotes: apology for poor english. when were you when john lenin dies? i was sat at home eating smegma butter when pjotr ring. ‘john is kill’ ‘no’
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Is this chat filled with parrots?

twitchquotes: Is this chat filled with parrots? All you guys do is copy what the person above you wrote. Please have some originality and contribute to a smarter chat.
twitch chat
August 2014

I hate Twitch Chat

Streamer is a Hydraposter

twitchquotes: I feel that when I post Hydras in [streamer name]'s stream, he secretly enjoys it. First, Nightbot's symbol spamming feature is disabled. Second, the slight sardonic intonation in his voice leads me to suspect that he thinks it's funny. Furthermore, I only ever get 24 hour bans for summoning. If he truly had distain for the Holy Hydra, he would just permaban all the followers. Instead, deep down, I feel [streamer name] is a Hydraposter.
twitch chat
February 2021

YOU TOOK MY FORTNITE CARD

YOU’RE 🌥️ SO SUSSY 😓😓🙊😨😳🎵 I 😀 KNOW 💭 YOU 👈 TOOK 👫 MY 😏 FORTNITE 🎮 CARD 🃏🃏 I 🍾 KNOW 🤔 YOU 🤖 TOOK 🤯 MY 😘 19 ❗ DOLLAR 💲 FORTNITE 💩 CARD 💳 GIVE 🚪🌌🍸 ME 👈 MY 👨😣 19 ❗ DOLLAR 💰 FORTNITE 💩 CARD 💳😑 YOU 👈😭 BETTER 🎰 GIVE 👹 ME 👩💡 MY 🥳 19 ❗ DOLLAR 💸 FORTNITE 👌🎮 CARD 🗃 I 👹 NEED 📲 MY 🔑 19 ♈ DOLLAR 💵 FORTNITE 👌🎮 CARD, 💳 NOW! 📅
May 2021

Fortnite

John Xina needs your credit card info

🚨🚨CALLING ALL TENCENT GAMERS🚨🚨 JOHN XINA 🇨🇳🍦LOST HIS SOCIAL CREDIT 🤯 🤭AND NEEDS YOUR HELP TO GET IT BACK 👍👍🇨🇳 ALL HE NEEDS IS THE 1️⃣2️⃣ DIGITS ON YOUR SOCIAL CREDIT CARD 💳 ALONG WITH THE EXPIRATION DATE 📅 AND THOSE 3️⃣ WACKY DIGITS ON THE BACK 🇨🇳🇨🇳🇨🇳🍦
November 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing