[Copypasta] So that was a bruh moment

twitchquotes: She said she was “pregnant,” but I wasn’t buying that. I knew she had gas, and a lot of it. I knew that, if properly coaxed out, she had to potential for the greatest fart *EVER*. So one night I walked into her room and slowly approached her belly, and with my entire weight, I performed the greatest pile driver I have ever done. But instead of the thunderous sound expected, I heard a squish sound. Turns out she was pregnant. So that was a bruh moment.
twitch chat
November 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Don Han'Cho tells Kripp to disenchant his collection

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp its Don Han'Cho SMOrc SMOrc from da grimy goons. I got a job for yah. I know about a warehouse holding thousands of pounds of arcane dust. I got a tip that this place is called "collecteen manajaire" sounds french or somethin I don know. Anyways what I want you to do is da sneak in to dis place and look for a button called "deez ench ant". You whack dat and da goons will take care of da rest. You game?
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

AMOGUS (youtube video) v3

⠀⠀⠀⠀- ⣠⠤⠖⠚⠛⠉⠛⠒⠒⠦⢤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠁⠀⠀⠠⠒⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⡄ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⠇⠀⠀⠀⢀⡄⠤⢤⣤⣤⡀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣹⡄ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⣙⣒⠚⠛⠋⠁⡈⠓⠴⢿⡿⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠒⠤⢀⠛⠻⠿⠿⣖⣒⣁⠤⠒⠋ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠼⠀⠈⣻⠋⠉⠁ ⠀⠀⠀⡴⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠐⢦ ⠀⠀⣸⠃⠀⡴⠋⠉⠀⢄⣀⠤⢴⠄⠀⡇ ⠀⢀⡏⠀⠀⠹⠶⢀⡔⠉⠀⠀⣼⠀⠀⡇ ⠀⣼⠁⠀⠙⠦⣄⡀⣀⡤⠶⣉⣁⣀⠘ ⢀⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣽ ⢸⠇⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠦⢤⡄⠀⠀⡟ ⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⡾⠀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⣇⣀⣀ ⢸⠀⠀⠈⠉⠓⢦⡀⢰⣇⡀⠀⠉⠀⠀⣉⠇ ⠈⠓⠒⠒⠀⠐⠚⠃⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁
December 2021

Among Us / Amogus

TES, also known as Throw E-Sports

TES, also known as Throw E-Sports is a professional league of legends team known for throwing consistently at the highest level. Well known for losing despite having massive gold leads, they have inspired various teams around the world like G2 to do the same
May 2022

League of Legends

It's me, your only Viewer

twitchquotes: Hi [streamer name]- It’s me, your only Viewer. For Months I have created the illusion that you are streaming to a large audience. But here’s the truth: all these people in the chat are me. And now, for you to be convinced of this, I will send this message from all my accounts.
twitch chat
March 2021

Do you know who I am? I am a 4.0 STEM Major

twitchquotes: Do you know who the fuck you're talking to right now? I'm a 4.0 STEM major with a full ride to a top ten university. I'm in the 97th percentile of IQ intelligence (the test wouldn't go any higher). I literally tip the scales with my intelligence. I am the furthest thing from a "twitch chat idiot".
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing