[Copypasta] In Japan, heart surgeon

Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Yakuza boss die! Yakuza very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret. I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
April 2021

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam

Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. He can seldom close his eyes without opening them again at fear of Charlies lurking in the jungle trees. Not that you could ever see the bastards, mind you. They were swift, and they knew their way around the jungle like nothing else. He remembers the looks on the boys' faces as he walked into that village and... oh, Jesus. The memories seldom left him, either. Sometimes he'd reminisce - even hear - Tex's southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes like nothing else. He always kept a pack of Lucky's with him. The boys are gone, now. He knows that; it's just that he forgets, sometimes. And, every now and then, the way that seven looks at him with avid concern in his eyes... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. Makes him feel like he's back there... in the jungle.
August 2021

Classic

I'm so glad to be in the other 1 percent

twitchquotes: They say 9 out of 10 twitch users are dumb. I'm so glad to be in the other 1 percent
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

Classic

Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ ͠ ͠°〜 ͜ʖ〜 ͠ ͠° ༽ノ¤=[———— Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya. You killed my Kappa. Prepare to die.
twitch chat
March 2015

Classic

Does it look like I give a duck about your chat experience?

twitchquotes: DuckerZ DOES DuckerZ IT DuckerZ LOOK DuckerZ LIKE DuckerZ I DuckerZ GIVE DuckerZ A DuckerZ DUCK DuckerZ ABOUT DuckerZ YOUR DuckerZ CHAT DuckerZ EXPERIENCE? DuckerZ
twitch chat
April 2016

Classic

WEEB pyramid

VoHiYo only real WEEB can build this perfect pyramid  VoHiYo  VoHiYo . Try like me !Try like me ! Try like me !!  VoHiYo  VoHiYo  VoHiYo And my pyramid still higher!!!!!!  VoHiYo  VoHiYo  VoHiYo  VoHiYo
twitch chat
June 2016

Weebs

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing