[Copypasta] Have you heard about Twitch Prime?

twitchquotes: Hey guys, have you heard about Twitch Prime? Did you know you can link your Amazon Prime account to your Twitch account, and subscriber to your favorite streamer FOREVER... for 30 days.. FOR FREE!
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. • ⁠Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ⁠• ⁠When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. • ⁠Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021

Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!!! The fate of Earth depends on YOU! When you ignored chat and didn't place the kitty on your lap and pet it, it lead to a global economic crash and all out nuclear war!! For the love of humanity put the damn kitty in your lap now and pet it like our lives depend on it!!!!! Sincerely , Future Kripp
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares they‘re trading/I‘m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I don‘t exactly know what‘s going on, it‘s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is „too irrelevant for the big stock market“. They are „aware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GME“. They acted as if GME was some „childish financial playground“ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how „GME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safe“. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Masturbation on a plane should be socially acceptable

March 2021

Saddam Hussein hiding spot v3

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July 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing