[Copypasta] Ahsoka Tano

twitchquotes: Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems. Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
twitch chat
November 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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Ram Ranch Hearthstone

twitchquotes: Jebaited 22 Murlocs in the PJSalt at Tavern Brawl! Big hard mind blasts wanting to be RENOUNCED! 22 Armorsmiths wanting to be pinged! Holy Novas in the PJSalt at Tavern Brawl! On their haHAA wanting to topdeck Krippo salt! Tavern Brawl really rocks! Jebaited
twitch chat
October 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

She needs a man that can treat her right

twitchquotes: What the fuck man. I'm literally sitting here on the verge of tears. Slaving away in this dead end job saving up for the end of the month splash. I was this close. Maybe I should have done that overtime, if I could get her that money earlier I might have been able to convince her in the dono message. She needs a man that can treat her right, a man like me. I would open the car door for her EVERY TIME, I would pull out her chair at a restaurant, I would lay my twitch hoodie over puddles to protect her from the filth.
twitch chat
December 2020

Simps

Bunchie the Llama

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ascii art
September 2021

Kripp's Sellout Castle

twitchquotes: It is the year 2016, the Paparrian waits patiently outside Kripp's Sellout Castle. The butler, Trump, opens the door and bows, "His Grace will see you now." Trump brings the Papa into Kripp's throne room, where he sits on a jeweled throne with the Succubus. "Kripp, my son," begins the Papa, but Trump interrupts, "You must pay to speak."
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

sellout

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
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