Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carl’s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Let's build a wall chat
twitchquotes:
Let's build a wall chat 
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twitch chat
2016 US Election
Sneaky goes 8th in TFT 8 times in a row
twitchquotes:
After going 8th 8 times in a row, "Patient 8" hits his head on the wall 8 times in quick succession. The patient only communicates to his "chat"; a bunch of random sentences strung together to find out what will make the patient communicate. The word "Meteos" seems to trigger some sort of erotic response in the patient.
twitch chat
Sneaky
Teamfight Tactics
Equal rights equal fights
I (15M) was walking from school to home today and a girl (15F) kicked my leg.
So yeah I was walking to home today and that bitchass girl kicked my leg. It didn't hurt too much it was more like a fly landing on me as my super muscly body protected me. But anyway, as a person that believes in gender equality I punched her a lot harder with my super muscly manly man fists and knocked her out, kidnapped her to my school's chemistry lab at night, then with my super smart brain I composed HCl (hydrochloric acid for those uneducated inferior peeps) with my super chemistry knowledge. I then dipped her in my glorious acid just like any gender equality believing sigma male would. Equal rights equal fights my dear superior reddit using sigma male friends.
I sexually Identify as an the sun
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as an the sun. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of slamming hydrogen isotopes into each other to make helium & light and send it throught the galaxy. People say to me that a person being a star is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon inflate me with hydrogen and raise my temperature to over 6000 °C. From now on I want you guys to call me “Sol” and respect my right to give you vitamin D and probably sunburns. If you can’t accept me you’re a fusionphobe and need to check your astral privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
I sexually Identify as
I am not a simp.
twitchquotes:
And I want to say this to the kings in the audience. I’ve made my mistakes in my chase for coochie. But in all of my years of chad life, I have never simped– never simped for a girl. I’ve earned every bit of cooch. And in all of my years of chad life, I have never paid for the meal. Because people have got to know whether or not I’m a simp. Well, I’m not a simp. I’ve never simped for any girl I’ve got. I am not a simp.
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