[Copypasta] Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft

Today my 12 year old and I walked into Harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudely asked why a 12 year old was signing up for a prestigious institute. My son proclaimed "Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft". The dean tried to apologize but the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated magnet koom louder on the first day of college.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!”

twitchquotes: BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Dex sits in a huge doghouse

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a huge doghouse. Full and content because of his "kibbles and bits" diet, he's too happy to move. He's so happy, and enjoys life. He knows his owner has hope of a 12 win run. He knows he could draw attention to himself, since he's the king of his house. In a single act of pride, Dex barks to give Kripp his praise. "Good boy Dex" is his response.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Lucina is a deep, complex, and intricate

twitchquotes: Lucina is one of the most deep, complex, and intricate characters in fighting game history and Zackray is an absolute hero for gracing us with his iteration of her
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

Angry laughing crying

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣾⣿⠿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⠏⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣽⣿⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢃⣾⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⣾⣿⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⡿⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⡿⠟⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠙⠻⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⡆⢸ ⣰⣿⡷⠀⠀⠀⣼⠟⠁⠀⢀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⡟⣻⠏⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣧⢠ ⢻⣿⠇⠀⠀⢰⡟⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠘⡧⠙⢿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡿⠋⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⡗⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⢸ ⣼⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⣸⣇⡀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⣠⣶⣿⡄⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⢸ ⡿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠘⢷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠻⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⠟⠁⠀⠙⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢨⣿⡟⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣤⠤⠶⠿⠷⠶⢶⣶⣾⣯⣀⣀⣀⣈⣛⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⡟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠈⠉⠉⣭⡍⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣦⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⡟⠁⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠈⠹⣿⣷⣶⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

Reynad, I admire you because you invented all the decks

twitchquotes: Reynad, I admire you because you invented all the decks. Thus, you invented my deck even if you never saw my deck.
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing