[Copypasta] Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft

Today my 12 year old and I walked into Harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudely asked why a 12 year old was signing up for a prestigious institute. My son proclaimed "Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft". The dean tried to apologize but the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated magnet koom louder on the first day of college.
December 2020
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Fat reddit snoo

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June 2021

so you're italian? name every pasta

barbine, bavette, bigoli, bucatini, busiate, capellini, fedellini, ferrazzuoli, fettuccine, fileja, linguine, lagane, lasagna, lasagnette, lasagnotte, maccheroni alla molinara. maccheroncini di campofilone mafalde, matriciani, pappardelle, perciatteli, picagge, pici, pillus, rustiche, sagne 'ncannulate, scialatelli, spaghetti, spagetthi alla chitarra, spaghettini, spaghettoni, stringozzi, su filindeu, tagliatelle, taglierini, trenette, tripoline, vermicelli, ziti, anelli, boccoli, calamarata, campanelle, cappeli da chef, casarecce, casacatelli, castellane, cavatappi, cavatelli, chifferi, cicioneddos, conchiglie, creste di galli, fagioloni, farfalle, fazzoletti, festoni, fiorentine, fiori, fusilli, fusilli bucati, garganelli, gemelli, gnocchi, lanterne, lorighittas, macaroni, maccheroncelli, mafaldine, malloreddus, mandala, marrile, mezzani, mezze maniche, mezze penne, mezzi bombardoni, nuvole, paccheri, passatelli, pasta el ceppo, penne, penne ricce, picchiarelli, pipe rigate, pizzoccheri, quadrefiore, radiatory, ricciollini, ricciutelle, rigatoncini, rigatoni, rombi, rotelle, sagnette, sagneralli, sedani, spirali, strapponi, strozzaperti, testaroli, tortigiloni, treccioni, trenne, trofie, trottole, tuffoli, vesuvio, cencioni, corzetti, fainelle, fogile, d'ulivo, orecchiette, acini de pepe, alphabet pasta, anchellini, anelli, anellini, armonie, conchigliette, corquilettes, coralli, corallini, cuscussu, ditali, egg barley, fideos, filini, fregula, funghini, gianduietta, grano, gramigne, grattini, grattoni, margerthine, merletti, midolline, occhi di passero, orzo, pastina, piombi, ptitim, puntine, quadrettini, sorprese, stelle, stortini, tripolini, agnolini, agnolotti, caccavelle, canneloni, cappelletti, caramelle, casoncelli, casunziei, conchiglioni, culurgiones, fagottini, lumache, mezzelune, occhi di lupo, pansotti, ravioli, rotolo ripieno, sacchettoni, tortelli, tortelloni, tufoli, canederli, donderet
November 2021

"Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!"

twitchquotes: "Only 200 Gems, are you kidding me?!" screams Kripp at the struggling mobile game dev who's game he is being sponsored to play. "How am I supposed to hit rank 1 without a massive head-start over everyone else!? I have to be able to brag to my chat about being #1 in every game I play!" The developer, scared, gives in to his demands. Business as usual for the Kripp.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

sellout

I'm going to kill that prosterino

twitchquotes: The Prostitute asks the Kripp, "Why don't you make a D3 video?" Kripp flies into a rage and hits her with an ornate salt shaker yelling, "I'm going to kill that prosterino!" When the cops finally caught him, after the 2 hour shootout, Kripp lies bleeding on the ground and mutters weakly to the sky..."I played that perfectly, nothing I coulda done cough what a joke.."
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Why did you pick Hero at EVO?

twitchquotes: Nairo, it's been weeks since EVO and I still don't understand why you didn't choose Hero and win the whole thing. It'll be a matter of time before we follow Australia's example and ban him, and you'll be sorry you didn't use his banworthy strength when you could. Also can you use Ganondorf again, he's rlly strong. Sorry for long message, but you should consider my advice. Good luck Nairo!
twitch chat
August 2019
NairoMK

Super Smash Bros

Text-to-Speech Playing