[Copypasta] Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft

Today my 12 year old and I walked into Harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudely asked why a 12 year old was signing up for a prestigious institute. My son proclaimed "Well you see sir, I watch Starcraft". The dean tried to apologize but the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated magnet koom louder on the first day of college.
December 2020
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

I think my boss might be a communist

I think my boss might be a communist. So a while ago, I got my first paycheck at my new job at a fast food place. I guess it wasn't too bad, but I did the math and figured out that I sold a lot more food per hour than I got paid for, even when you account for the price of the food. When I tried to talk to him about it, he said we're all part of one big team, but some people get paid more than others. This is suspiciously close to the famous "some are more equal than others" from my favorite book, Animal Farm and is what really got me thinking about this. We make the money, and then he takes it and gives it to someone who doesn't even work! I'm not economist, but this is textbook socialism. I think I've come to the conclusion that the best way for me to combat these socialist business practices would be teaming up with my fellow workers unify our power and demonstrate that we understand the full value of our labor. Anyone else have similar experiences with obviously Marxist bosses before, or any other advice?
May 2021

Avoid embarrasing incidents

twitchquotes: Hey chat, take it easy please. Sometimes I see the same message posted twice. Take your time to actually read chat to avoid embarrassing incidents like this. Thank you. :)
twitch chat
December 2018

Classic

I want to come. Not on your face

twitchquotes: I want to come. Not on your face. Not on your titties. I want to come over whenever you need me. Those late nights when you have too much on your mind. Or you have nothing on your mind. Iโ€™ll be there, whenever you need me.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

Gru and Spongebob fanfic

August 2021

Spongebob

NSFW

Joker

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing