Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
no one will notice me seeking attention from strangers
twitchquotes:
chat moving so fast no one will notice me seeking attention from strangers on the internet because my parents didn't give me any.
twitch chat
How can this guy call himself a professional streamer
twitchquotes:
π‘ How can this guy call himself a professional streamer when he CLEARLY has no clue about what he's doing. You're supposed to kill the application process tree not alt+f4 like a fucking monkey 
Seriously I'm done watching this guy and if I see any one of your fuckers copypaste this I'll delete my account π‘
Seriously I'm done watching this guy and if I see any one of your fuckers copypaste this I'll delete my account π‘
twitch chat
HELLO EU? How many games did you win?
twitchquotes:
π 
HELLO EU? π How many games did you win today ? π
HELLO EU? π How many games did you win today ? π
twitch chat
League of Legends
EU vs NA
I thought my parents were rap battling
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My parents were fighting and I thought they were rap battling so I came in and started beatboxing. Fuck fuck fuck why am I such an idiot fuck fuck fuck
Kripp finally picks Pogo
twitchquotes:
Dear Mr. Kripparian, thank you so much for finally picking Pogo! Ever since you picked Pogo, his grades have gone up, he finally got a girlfriend, and he's stopped masturbating all day in his bedroom. I was certain my little Pogo was going to end up a lifeless virgin loser for his entire life, but your kind actions have put Pogo on a path for success. Thank you, thank you, you have my sincerest gratitude. Much love, Pogo's mom.
twitch chat
Kripp