[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Monster Amogus Crewmate With Tongue

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May 2022

Among Us / Amogus

NA aka "Not Able"

twitchquotes: NA, aka "Not Able," is a minor region in Riot's League of Legends that is often ridiculed for failing to show up at international performances. It is specifically known for the money wasted to bring in midlaners with dental problems from better regions.
twitch chat
July 2019

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Professor Utonium

██████████████████████ ██████████████████████ █░░██████████████░░░██ █░░░░██████████░░░░███ █░░░░░░██████░░░░░████ █░░░░░░░███░░░░░░█████ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░████ ██████░░░███████░░░███ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░██ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░███ █░▄▀▀███░░▄▀▀██▄░░░░░░░█ █░█─████░░█─████░░░░░░░█ █░█▄████░░█▄████░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░███ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░█░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░███░░░█░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░█░░█░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░█░█░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░██░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ █░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░█ ██████████░░░░░░░░████ ───────█─██░░░░░░██──█ ───────█──███░░███───█ ───────█────████─────█ ───────█─────██──────█
September 2021

Day 2 without sports

twitchquotes: Day 2 without sports: Found a young lady sitting on my couch yesterday. Apparently she’s my wife. She seems nice. Apparently we also have 2 kids.
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

You guessed it right LEL KEK xD

twitchquotes: OSkomodo My KEK is strong OSkomodo My LEL flows free OSkomodo You guessed it right OSkomodo LEL KEK xD OSkomodo
twitch chat
February 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing