Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
What happened to this ad? :(
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HITLER
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Now that all the girls stop reading this...
twitch chat
imaqtpie
The creation of Among Us and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race
The creation of Among Us and it's consequences have been a disaster for the human race. Just a few months after youtubers and twitch streamers brought it to fame, it had been loaded with kids infested with the hype of the game among us. Furthermore, the constant use of Among us had rendered the game boring, as it entered the downfall stage of a game's popularity, just like Fall Guys. However, this is not something you should celebrate; since the constant use had also brought a new genre or era of memes, often referred to as post-irony. A bastardized version of Among Us called "Amogus" was used for the game in these meme's contexts, going viral in the Urban Dictionary. All the cultures of normie memes and pre-2020 memes have been wiped off as the "Amogus" meme exploded. Post irony has caused a greater disaster where everybody sees things as the crewmate in the mobile game Among Us. As memes began referring to everything as the crewmate, people have been driven to insanity. People who used to be normal looking at memes were now infected by the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon, which renders everything as something they've seen constantly. "Amogus Everywhere" is the bastardized name of the Phenomenon. Capitalistic-driven people have been competing for a Amogus-crewmate chicken nugget, costing $100,000 at an auction. I hope life returns to normal as Among Us and Amogus have been wiped of the face of this Earth.
Among Us / Amogus
Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta
HEY ππ© there comrade π¦πͺcummy! the πΉ supreme π cockπ has π³voted to strike π©ββοΈβοΈdown the π sexy π€§π€°π»roe v. wade decision πaccording π€€π¦Άπ»to a opinion πwrittenβοΈπΈ by daddy π
π»π sammy πΆπ»π
π»ββοΈ aLITo. π·π¨ the opinion is a π¦π FULL THROATED π²β€οΈβπ₯GIRTHY π contraDICKtion π«π of the 1973 πΏπdecision that ππ»ββοΈπ guaranteed federal π€ cocks-titutuinal π³ protection π
πof abortion rights!!! β€οΈβπ₯π«‘everyone who π³οΈβππ¦ woke remember πβπ»π€ to fund πΈπ₯΅ planned parenthood and πͺπΌ donate to π§πΌβπΌπ€abortion funds! get yo πΈuturuses ππ turnt you πwhore! πevery whore knows π§ πΌthat everyone πshould have π©ββοΈπ₯access to safe π πabortions β€οΈπ if they choose π
π»π to have one. ππΉsend to ten π¬πof your closest π±π
ΎοΈWHORES to secure abortion π«π€rights in ameriCUM π€€πΊπΈif you get five β back abortion ππrights will be codified π©ββοΈπ€€in law πΈπ
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Politics
Keep it, you need it more with all that salt
twitchquotes:
`So today i was in the supermarket going to buy some cheese for the next week before the stores close, got 8 packages of finest Dutch. When i was waiting in line to pay for it a gentleman in front of me collapsed, his wife looked at us and said "He has Hypoglycemia, someone please bring something that contains sugar!!". I immediately ran to the sweets section, after only 1 minute of choosing since i was in a hurry, i went with ice-cream snickers bar and ran back to the register, with my trembling hands i got rid of the plastic cover, i leaned to the old gentleman, when he turned to me: "I know you..." he said "you are that guy from Twitch... Keep it, you need it more with all that salt..." -Forsen 2015
twitch chat
Forsen