[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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RNGesus pounds Reynad's sweet, supple orifice relentlessly

twitchquotes: Hello fair maiden Reynad, this is the valiant knight Sir Coppus Pastaronus. I have come to rescue you from the mystical Tower of Salt, where the cruel innkeeper RNGesus has pounded your sweet, supple orifice relentlessly to the beat of Lord Kappa Please no paste.
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March 2014
Reynad

It makes no sense!

twitchquotes: I don't know why people have to copy/paste other people messages. It makes no sense!
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April 2018

Your social credit score has increased

ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [5] Integers. Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [100] Integers. You can now have priority transport and can now get into prestigious colleges! Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Citzen! Your social credit score has increased by [500] Integers. You can now take up official, government job, where we pay you high salary, unlike America. Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [1000] Integers. We will ensure you get great salary, good benefits, and good social standing, no matter the means. Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ]Copied! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [5000] Integers. You will be famous across mainland of China, for what you are currently doing. We will make you celebrity, and even better salary. Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [10000] Integers. Xi Jinping would like to meet you personally at Zhongnanhai to encourage your good work. I am sure you notice that you have gained lot of dislike recently. Do not worry. We will send re-education vans to make sure your figure is in good graces. Keep up the good work! [ ไธญๅŽไบบๆฐ‘ๅ…ฑๅ’Œๅ›ฝๅฏ„่ฏญ]
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๏ผฆ๏ผก๏ผซ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผฒ๏ผฉ๏ผง๏ผจ๏ผด ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ ๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฅ ๏ผฐ๏ผต๏ผณ๏ผณ๏ผน

twitchquotes: ๏ผฆ๏ผก๏ผซ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผฒ๏ผฉ๏ผง๏ผจ๏ผด ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ ๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฅ ๏ผฐ๏ผต๏ผณ๏ผณ๏ผน
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August 2014
ognglobal

Seagull

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ—โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
December 2015
Kripp
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