[Copypasta] Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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cannabis addiction

twitchquotes: iam a 7 year old boy with a cannabis addiction, iam in rehab and i only have lol streams for entertainment, i wish to be the best mordekaiser in ze world, can u teach me bjerg? This is my story dont copy paste plz
twitch chat
July 2014
Bjergsen

No more WalMart rollbacks for you

twitchquotes: Dear imaqtpie,My name is Nightblue3 and i hate you for trolling me out of challenger. This is your official warning - I have reported you to the security professionals at WalMart. You will be banned on site. No more rollbacks for you.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

Donkey Kong

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ”€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ”€β”€ β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β”€β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β”€β”€β–„β–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β–„β–„β”€β”€β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–β–β–„β”€β–€β–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β”€β–€β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€ β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€ β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
September 2021

Nairo Meta Whore

twitchquotes: NairoMK? more like Nairo Meta Whore (whore with a silent K). all you do is play the most broken characters because they are "meta" what the crap even is the meta. i miss when you used to be loyal to your characters like Zero. Zero is a HARDCORE final fantasy fan and played cloud in tournament despite the nerfs to his favorite character. enjoy your cheap wins until the next patch hits and nerfs your busted characters. us character loyalists will gladly take your top seed. Lucas main BTW.
twitch chat
April 2019
NairoMK

Minecraft creeper

β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
December 2020
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