Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Kripp's IQ is officially more than 1000
twitchquotes:
nice win man you totally outplayed him on every level, every single play you did showed a whole new level of skill and meta beyond our mortal brains understandings, i have no idea how its even humanly possible to be so amazing at this card game as you are Kripp, your IQ is officially more than 1000
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Kripp
Oh god I want xqc so bad
twitchquotes:
Oh god I want xqc so bad ๐ฉ ๐ฆ he's so smart ๐ค ๐ and cute ๐ ๐ I would take him to my apartment and kiss him ๐ ๐ lick him ๐
๐ and finger him 
๐ I would fuck him ๐ ๐ฆ then I'd get him pregnant ๐คฐ ๐ถ and we'd raise our own little baby ๐จ๐จ๐ฆ ๐ฆ and play fortnite with him ๐ฎ โจ๏ธ xd
๐ I would fuck him ๐ ๐ฆ then I'd get him pregnant ๐คฐ ๐ถ and we'd raise our own little baby ๐จ๐จ๐ฆ ๐ฆ and play fortnite with him ๐ฎ โจ๏ธ xd
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xQcOW
Emoji Pasta
I(21M) am convinced that my(20F) wife's pet rabbit thinks my wife is his mate, it is ruining our marriage
It all started when I was dating my wife. I met her four years ago and we have been dating all 4 years. She has had the rabbit since before I met her.
The little bastard is old and saggy and partially blind. Some parts of his body is missing patches of fur because he pulls it out to make a nest for himself and my wife.
When we met the rabbit was not a major issue. It would scratch and bite at me but my wife assured me he was just nervous to have another person in her apartment as my wife and the rabbit lived alone since my wife was 18.
We have been married one year now and the rabbit is wreaking havoc on our marriage but my wife refuses to do anything because to her the rabbit is her baby and she loves it more than anything.
When I first moved in the rabbit did not do much to me or us other than the previously mentioned bites and scratches but he shows my wife too much affection for just a owner.
We will be doing anything and she will have the rabbit with her on top of her chest on her breasts licking them and her face. She will not put it down at all whenever she is home with it. We eat dinner, he is there, she goes to the bathroom, he comes with, she is showering? He waits outside for her, watching her nude in the shower. Wife does not even let me in the bathroom with her.
It has gone to the point where whenever I show my wife affection the rabbit seeks revenge on me. Sometimes not immediately but at times he does attack me on the spot when I kiss my wife. Sometimes I find little tiny brown balls, his shit in my closet.
Another thing is that she lets the little shit roam free all day but nighttime and when we are making love. This was not previously the case but after an accident during lovemaking and much long conversations I convinced my wife to put the rabbit in its cage when we are making love.
But now whenever I am making love to my wife, like clockwork, the little shit knows what we are doing and screams at the top of its lungs until my wife abandons what she is doing, even nude and comes to the smug little shits rescue. He is doing this out of pure spite.
I am aware that rabbits only scream when very stressed or in danger but he is in his huge cage because my wife spoils him only during night and when we make love, I swear he is doing this to ruin our marriage. He thinks my wife is his mate and wants to get rid of me.
I have scars all over my body from bites and scratches and my life refuses to do anything about the rabbit or how much time she spends with it.
We are in couples therapy and our marriage is very rocky. What do I do?
Wife wants to leave me because of an NFT diamond ring
My wife loves new technology and is into cryptocurrency and so I thought it would be thoughtful to buy her a diamond ring as a NFT.
I spent about 3 ETH which is like $12000 CAD. So when she got home from work I told her I had a surprise for her.
I put a blindfold on my wife and guided her into our room where our computer is set up. Soon as she opened her eyes and saw what it was, she absolutely exploded with rage saying I was an asshole and was only thinking about myself. She then accused me of spending money on stupid thing and said sheโs going to go find a boyfriend.
I donโt know what to do in this situation. I was only thinking about HER interests and how happy she would be to receive this new technology. Plus the price of her ring will only appreciate. Stupid real diamonds only depreciate.
We have now signed up for NFT relationship counselling.
I have been seeking relationship advice but everyone says to buy her NFT flowers or NFT chocolates. And when I did that, that was the last straw.
Wife sent me divorce papers and I converted it into NFT. I know in the long run when all these NFTโs moon. She will come crawling back.
I smoke the weed everyday
twitchquotes:
I smoke the weed everyday, I too am a Marijuana consumer. 420 is my favourite number. By the way, did I mention that I hit that kush good. I'm so high right now, becuase of all the weed I smoke. 420 Blaze it fam, life is good.
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