Ok, so today I was talking to my friend over text. I asked him what's his favorite anime but then he told me that he doesn't watch it and thinks it's boring. I was confused as to why he didn't watch anime. I told him about how much I like to watch anime "for the plot" but he didn't really show much interest. I then asked him if we could play Among Us later but then he said he has to go to church this afternoon. I never knew he was a Christian. I was asking him why he believed in God and he didn't reply so I told him he's intellectually inferior to me and that his parents indoctrinated him into believing in God. I was sending him scientific studies that show proof that atheists are more intellectually superior to people who believe in religion. I later found out that he was attending a funeral at the church.
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Kripp defending Blizzard on Diablo Immortal
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, video game journalist and decent human being here. Looking to get your thoughts on the disgusting response of entitled gamers to the Diablo Immortal reveal. On a scale from Hitler (least evil) to Straight White Male PC Gamer (most evil), how would you characterize those who criticize Blizzard? Hope to hear you are as unbiased as I am, thanks!
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Kripp
Ameng meets Bumper in a hallway
twitchquotes:
Bumper broke into a cold sweat. There he was across the hallway, a man whose name that brought chills down his spine. Bumper looked down, hoping to avoid direct eye contact. "A-ameng," Bumper stuttered. "What up, virgin" Ameng boomed. Bumper braced himself but it was too late. Ameng's 5000 tonne shoulder slammed into his, the movement causing air waves across the room. Bumper flew back and the concrete wall chipped around him. His shoulder was definitely broken. "Later, nerd." Ameng chuckled.
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague
Overwatch
Kripp's Sellout Castle
twitchquotes:
It is the year 2016, the Paparrian waits patiently outside Kripp's Sellout Castle. The butler, Trump, opens the door and bows, "His Grace will see you now." Trump brings the Papa into Kripp's throne room, where he sits on a jeweled throne with the Succubus. "Kripp, my son," begins the Papa, but Trump interrupts, "You must pay to speak."
twitch chat
Kripp
sellout
Mesmerized
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twitch chat
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"