[Copypasta] FitnessGram Pacer Test

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
September 2016

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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When I use this text, my brain cell begin to die

twitchquotes: when i use this text, my brain cell automatically begin to die. yet i continue to copypasta and feel i contribute to the internet. all becoming retard.
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March 2014
Kripp

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Navy Seal

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
April 2019

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Navy Seal

Hey subs, it's me walking with my $5, don't mind me

twitchquotes: Hey subs! [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅5)̲̅$̲̅]ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ง It's me walking with my $5, don't mind me.
twitch chat
August 2015

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plebs vs subs

Hey Doublelift, I'm trying to learn to play Shaco

twitchquotes: HEY DOUBLELIFT, I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO PLAY SHACO. I JUST HAVE A QUESTION ABOUT THE SKILL BUILD: SHOULD I MAX BACKSTAB LIKE YOU BACKSTABBED CLG, DECEIVE LIKE YOU DECEIVED CLG, OR HALLUCINATE LIKE YOU MADE CLG HALLUCINATE ABOUT HAVING A CHANCE AT WINNING ANOTHER TOURNAMENT
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November 2015
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League of Legends

THE WRONG DONGERHOOD

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ YOU CAME TO THE WRONG DONGERHOOD ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽ºل͟º ༽
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March 2016

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Text-to-Speech Playing