[Copypasta] Please help, when I sneeze, it sounds like I'm saying the n-word

I'm not sure what to do. For my early life, it wasn't a huge deal. I lived in a mostly white family who didn't really care, and I stayed home from school when I was sick. But now that I'm in college, I'm terrified of what it could mean. Doctors won't help me. Every time I've asked, they think I'm making it up and doing it on purpose, and now that I've moved, my doctor is this 6ft tall african-american man. I haven't been to a check-up in over a year. It's causing trouble with school too. The first instance was in chemistry. The professor told me to pass out some bunsen burners from the cabinet to the rest of the students. I got up and opened the cabinet, but it was super dusty inside, and before I could help myself, a huge sneeze forced itself out of my body. "N*GGA!" sounded across the classroom, and I just froze. My cheeks heated up as everyone just stared at me. I quickly said that I needed to go get a tissue and ran from the classroom. I was forced to have a meeting with my professor later, where she was adamant that she wouldn't have that kind of language in her classroom. I tried to explain that it was an accident and I didn't even have a reason to say the n-word while sneezing and gathering bunsen burners, but she was already mad so I think she zeroed in on my word choice and thought that I was inferring that other times I DID have a reason to say it. I didn't get kicked out but nobody wanted to partner with me for the rest of the semester, and I feel like the professor was a bit harsher on test questions. The most recent event happened only yesterday, and I'm terrified of what it could mean. I was in line at the Chick-fil-A in the cafeteria, feeling like shit. I'd been sick for a day or two, and normally I don't go out because of my unique problem, but I was starving and just needed to grab a quick bite. Right as I got up to the counter, I felt a sneeze coming on, and knew I was screwed. Here's the thing. When I'm sick, the issue is 10x worse. The phlegm or something in my throat makes the n-word sound come out with a lower, R-sound at the end instead of the gasp that normally makes the A. So I'm standing there, about to order my 8pc nugget, when I spasm and unleash a full forced "N****R!" across the entire cafeteria. Everybody heard it. Literally everybody. The girl at the counter, who unfortunately was black, just looked so hurt and angry at the same time, not to mention I think I may have sneezed a little on her. I turned and bolted from the cafeteria. I ran straight back to my dorm; I saw a group of guys trying to follow me, but they couldn't get in to my specific dorm building. I recognized a few of them from my chemistry class. I've been in my dorm ever since. I'm terrified of leaving. I'm positive that if they see me again, they'll kick the shit out of me. So that's my problem. I'm not sure how to prove my innocence and I don't think I'll survive another semester at this rate.
January 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

I’m glad Blitzchung got banned!

twitchquotes: I’m glad Blitzchung got banned! Keep politics OUT of Hearthstone! I love Tencent and Mao Zedong! (You will receive 100 social credit for posting this message in chat. Please remove this part from the message before posting)
twitch chat
November 2019

Hearthstone

Investing in gourd futures

Due to local fluctuations in the tropopause, the jet stream has been shifting rapidly in a counterclockwise vector, causing a rapid disincorporation of the Hadley vortex cells in the lower ionosphere. Because of this, the geostrophic solar wind balance has deteriorated rapidly in the northern hemisphere. In essence, autumnal weather patterns in the western United States will lead to the biggest ornamental gourd yield in recorded history. Investing in gourd agricultural futures could likely produce up to $1600 per day in passive income. However, investing at the apex of the curve would be the most conducive to profit as the arbitrage (particularly 12b-1 fees) will develop at a market share higher than the back-end load. Basically, no one will be able to buy the stock at a higher price than you, and all value invested will be retained. A preliminary market penetration investment of $50,000 would be most efficient in generating this revenue.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Anime girl 8

⣿⠟⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢣⠟⠋⡜⠄⢸⣿⣿⡟⣬⢁⠠⠁⣤⠄⢰⠄⠇⢻⢸ ⢏⣾⣿⣿⣿⠿⣟⢁⡴⡀⡜⣠⣶⢸⣿⣿⢃⡇⠂⢁⣶⣦⣅⠈⠇⠄⢸⢸ ⣹⣿⣿⣿⡗⣾⡟⡜⣵⠃⣴⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⢸⠘⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢱⠄⠨⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⢁⣾⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⡎⠐⠒⠚⠛⠛⠿⢧⠄⠄⢠⣼ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠿⢸⡿⠭⠭⢽⣿⣿⣿⢂⣿⠃⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡾ ⣼⠏⣿⡏⠄⠄⢠⣤⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣟⣾⣾⣼⣿⠒⠄⠄⠄⡠⣴⡄⢠⣿⣵ ⣳⠄⣿⠄⠄⢣⠸⣹⣿⡟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡻⡖⠦⢤⣔⣯⡅⣼⡿⣹ ⡿⣼⢸⠄⠄⣷⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣕⡜⡌⡝⡸⠙⣼⠟⢱⠏ ⡇⣿⣧⡰⡄⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣋⣪⣥⢠⠏⠄ ⣧⢻⣿⣷⣧⢻⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢀⣀⣀⡙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠄⠄ ⢹⣼⣿⣿⣿⣧⡻⣿⣿⣇⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣰⠄⠄⠄ ⣼⡟⡟⣿⢸⣿⣿⣝⢿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⢟⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄⡀⡀ ⣿⢰⣿⢹⢸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⣸⢰⡇ ⣿⣾⣹⣏⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣍⡻⣛⣛⣛⡉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢇⡏⠄
May 2019

Weebs

PepeHands

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⢠⠤⠖⠒⠒⠲⢬⣇⣀⠤⠠⢄⣀⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡯⠁⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⡶⠖⠲⠾⣢⡠⣴⡲⠶⠶⣶⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢞⣛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡿⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⠿⠷⢶⡶⠶⠶⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⢠⠴⠞⠋⠀⠐⠲⠼⣷⠖⠲⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⢻⣿⣿⡿⢃⢰⡍⠝⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣵⣖⣓⡲⠦⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣨⡥⢆⣏⢨⠻⡘⣆⣷⡸⣸ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⢄⡈⠉⠉⠉⠙⠒⢂⡄⡀⠀⡄⠶⠶⠶⣂⡿⢻⢸⣷⣾⣿⢟⣵⣿ ⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢦⡀⢸⣤⣇⢠⡇⢰⠐⣿⡟⢰⣿⣿⠟⣫⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣙⠻⢿⢿⣿⠖⢫⣾⣿⣷⢸⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⡆⣿⣦⡙⢿⣿⣏⣿⣿⣷⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣎⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⢁⣿⣿⣿⣦⡙⣿⢻⣿⣿⡇⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⡝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣜⢿⣿⣿⡿⢰⣿⣿⣿⢘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡙⢿⢣⣿⣿⣿⡏⣼⣧⣌⠻⢿⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Pepe

Text-to-Speech Playing