[Copypasta] I thought my parents were rap battling

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck mann fick fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck My parents were fighting and I thought they were rap battling so I came in and started beatboxing. Fuck fuck fuck why am I such an idiot fuck fuck fuck
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Investing in gourd futures

Due to local fluctuations in the tropopause, the jet stream has been shifting rapidly in a counterclockwise vector, causing a rapid disincorporation of the Hadley vortex cells in the lower ionosphere. Because of this, the geostrophic solar wind balance has deteriorated rapidly in the northern hemisphere. In essence, autumnal weather patterns in the western United States will lead to the biggest ornamental gourd yield in recorded history. Investing in gourd agricultural futures could likely produce up to $1600 per day in passive income. However, investing at the apex of the curve would be the most conducive to profit as the arbitrage (particularly 12b-1 fees) will develop at a market share higher than the back-end load. Basically, no one will be able to buy the stock at a higher price than you, and all value invested will be retained. A preliminary market penetration investment of $50,000 would be most efficient in generating this revenue.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

How about you respect people's wishes and not copy paste?

twitchquotes: Really? Is saying "Don't copy paste this" some secret phrase for "actually copy paste this". How about you respect people's wishes and not copy paste if they ask you not to. Please don't copy paste this.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

This guy's DDOS is crazy

twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's DDOS is CRAZY!” ☑ “My ISP can't win against a DDOS like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely this IP to win" ☑ “He used the only DDOS site the that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect program” ☑ “There was nothing I could do” ☑ “I streamed that perfectly"!!!
twitch chat
January 2015

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

I put sushi in my husband’s butthole while he was asleep

He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.
May 2022

Squidward with boobs

⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠀ ⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⡶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣶⣭⣽⣿⣿⣷⣆ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⢿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠉⠁⠈⠉⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⡿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⢴⣐⢦⠀⠀⠀⣴⡖⣦⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⡔⣻⣭⡇⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠦⣬⣟⢓⡄⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⠿⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣷⣭⣭⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀ ⠀⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⢻⣿⣿⡄⠀ ⠀⢸⣿⣮⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢹⣿⣿⣿⡟⢛⢻⣷⢻⣿⣧⠀ ⠀⠀⣿⡏⣿⡟⡛⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣼⣿⢸⣿⣿⠀
September 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing