[Copypasta] The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas

The year is 2030. The AOC is now the Supreme Emperor of the United States and the Americas, and has successfully executed her forced feminization program, converting 72% of the us male population into women, the remaining 28% either existing peacefully as femboy subs or have fled the country, if they're lucky. All references to Dr. Seuss, Mr. Potatohead, and other such martyrs and thoughtcrimes will lead to prompt and inevitable cancellation by means of Jewish space laser. All statues of white people have been torn down and replaced with statues of AOC alongside Mao Zedong and Che Guevara, and the public has thus collectively forgotten about Robert E. Lee. The constitution has its 28th amendment, codifying mandatory cock and ball torture for all penis-having citizens no less than twice a week. It is illegal to say "Merry Christmas". Heterosexual relationships are strictly forbidden. Attack Helicopter, with pronouns brr/brrs, is a gender recognized on the official list of 93. The police have been almost entirely defunded, nationally having an annual budget of $5.30, enough for a single Big Mac Combo Meal. There is a new arm of the state, namely the "rape police" whose sole duty is functionally a secret task force to ensure all consent is affirmative and enthusiastic. All citizens must pledge allegiance to the LGBTQIA+ rainbow flag and swear oaths on White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo. All g*mers have been deported. Mexico is now the 53rd state, behind Puerto Rico and Washington DC. All bathrooms are gender-neutral. Marxism, the theory proposing the government do a lot of things, has become the official state ideology, including mandatory education on critical race theory beginning in pre-K. White people are second class citizens, guilty of being white, and all white people must publicly apologize on the behalf of their race as a coming-of-age ceremony at the beginning of pubescence. Facts now care about feelings. We will no longer be subjugated by AOC and her inner party, the Squad. The Culture War is not over. We will not be cancelled. We are the resistaβ€” radio static
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

⚠️WARNING⚠️ cock inspection is NOT required at the vaccination sites!!!! don't be tricked like me!!

So I was waiting in line to receive my vaccine when all of a sudden this medical "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my patient registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm patient identity. Because I thought he was a medical official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I received the vaccine I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy vaccinating!
August 2021

Coronavirus

COVID

Vaccines

Mango Bay CoolCat

twitchquotes: CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat π“œπ“ͺ𝓷𝓰𝓸 𝓑π“ͺ𝔂 CoolCat
twitch chat
January 2017

Dota 2

This guy's wallet is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: β˜‘ β€œThis guy's wallet is CRAZY!” β˜‘ β€œMy bank account can't win against a payment like that” β˜‘ "He NEEDED precisely those two credit cards to win" β˜‘ β€œHe bought the only card that could beat me” β˜‘ "He had the perfect purchase" β˜‘ β€œThere was nothing I could buy" β˜‘ β€œI paid that perfectly"
twitch chat
February 2017

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Inflatable seahorse

twitchquotes: This deck is gayer than a malaysian transvestite f*cking a man on an inflatable seahorse
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing