Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell. You get to have sweet ass chunky highlights and drive a big hideous SUV you secretly eat 3 donuts a day in and dont report to weight watchers. You can go to your jazzersize class absolutely fucked up on airplane bottles of rum and a perc you got from your friend who has back issues. Call your daughter a whore in front of her friends when she's 12 then pretend not to remember it when she brings it up deeply traumatized in her 20s. Fucking boss bitch shit straight up. Just blasting "dude looks like a lady" max volume flooring it to a target to cause a ruckus returning a bath mat. Not giving a single shit if its problematic. You like it that way. Making your dumbass kids apologize to YOU when you say racist shit. Getting zooted on your strawberry nosed husbands blood pressure meds. Hell yes queen fucking slay.
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Great Thermo-War
twitchquotes:
It is the year 2134. I am one of the last people on the planet. Nearly everyone was wiped out in the Great Thermo-War. Now there is no reason to live. I open my holodeck-transponder and go to "Twitch tv". I turn on Kripp's stream and see that he has made it to Rank 10. I succumb to my radiation poisoning.
twitch chat
Kripp
Sonic Inflation
Today I learned that in 2003 the fast food company βSonicβ began printing out their own money to pay their workers. This led to a huge inflation in the economy and was one of the leading factors of the 2008-2009 recession. Would highly recommend looking up Sonic Inflation on google if you want to learn more.
Times change...
twitchquotes:
Laying on the ground, devastated by the news my beloved Kripp has joined TSM, a hooded figure approaches, kneels down, grabs me by the shoulder. βThis was not his destiny.β I said, holding back the tears. I look up, the stranger removes his hood and looks me in the eye, βTimes Changeβ¦β says Trump, as he pushes me to the ground. This wasnβt supposed to happen. 
twitch chat
Kripp
Nicholas Cage You Don't Say
I, a god-level CoD player, could join the military
Ok. Listen up bud. Youβre a kid, and youβre getting cocky. You snuck in a few good quick scopes and got a few points ahead of me, but you have no chance. I am a Call of Duty god. I would be killing terrorists in Iraq if it werenβt for the fact that I would punch the drill sergeant in the face if he even looked at me funny. So donβt get cocky, bud. Or just like my kill/death ratio, youβre going down, kid. As soon as I finish the campaign Iβm tracking your IP, hunting you down and beating the crap out of you. Youβve been warned.