[Copypasta] Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell

Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell. You get to have sweet ass chunky highlights and drive a big hideous SUV you secretly eat 3 donuts a day in and dont report to weight watchers. You can go to your jazzersize class absolutely fucked up on airplane bottles of rum and a perc you got from your friend who has back issues. Call your daughter a whore in front of her friends when she's 12 then pretend not to remember it when she brings it up deeply traumatized in her 20s. Fucking boss bitch shit straight up. Just blasting "dude looks like a lady" max volume flooring it to a target to cause a ruckus returning a bath mat. Not giving a single shit if its problematic. You like it that way. Making your dumbass kids apologize to YOU when you say racist shit. Getting zooted on your strawberry nosed husbands blood pressure meds. Hell yes queen fucking slay.
March 2021
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Ice Poseidon

⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠒⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡘⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⣠⣀⣀⡀⠄⠱⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣄⣀⣀⣀⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣹⣿⣿⡇⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⡤⠄⠁⠄⠈⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⡄⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠋⣼⣷⠄⣷⣾⠛⡉⠉⡓⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡤⠤⠤⠤⢤⡀⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠄⣿⣿⢰⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣷⣶⣛⣩⣤⣄⠹⣤⣤⣀⣂⣠⣿⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠄⠄⣿⡟⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⠄⠄⠘⢿⡆⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⠋⠉⠛⠛⠻⣿⡿⠿⠻⠿⠿⠿⣿⡟⠈⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣏⢻⣦⣤⡘⠷⣴⣶⣧⣄⡠⠄⢀⣀⠏⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣄⠈⠄⢻⣿⣿⣶⡦⠤⠭⠤⠤⣾⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣧⡀⠄⠙⣿⣿⣇⡀⣀⠄⠿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣤⡀⠄⠘⠘⠁⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⠦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
January 2019

I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps

twitchquotes: Trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable *** off the face of the continent, you little ***. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your *** tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will *** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re *** dead, kiddo.
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

I use Linux as my operating system

"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux." The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long." With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
June 2021

Hi I 15 year old somalian rhinoceros

twitchquotes: BibleThump hi I 15 year old somalian rhinoceros i need surgery for gud horn pls send money to my owner nigerian prince pls no pasterino my story BibleThump
twitch chat
August 2015
Reynad
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