[Copypasta] its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021
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THROW THIS CRAB 2 MAKE HBOX MAD

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HI FORSEN, IT'S YOUR FRIEND TRUMP HERE

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Tomato Town Police Report

The residents of Tomato Town need your help identifying two suspects who were about to get down while involved in an event on Monday evening. Ten people were eliminated, and the two suspects, one injured, left the scene headed Southbound and were later spotted at a local park. The two suspects were armed with golden scar ARs and were “hitting that chug jug” as several witnesses stated. Please alert local Tomato Town authorities with any information regarding the duo.
March 2021

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I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store

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November 2019

Doraemon

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠶⣶⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⢀⠈⢿⢀⣀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣟⡇⢘⣾⣽⠀⠀⡏⠉⠙⢛⣿⣷⡖⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠿⠷⠶⠤⠙⠒⠀⠒⢻⣿⣿⡷⠋⠀⠴⠞⠋⠁⢙⣿⣄ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠋⠉⠹⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣇⣀⣀⣀⣛⣛⣒⣲⢾⡷ ⢀⠤⠒⠒⢼⣿⣿⠶⠞⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣼⠃ ⢮⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠻⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⣼⠃⠀ ⠈⠓⠶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠈⠒⢤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡠⠚⠁⠀⢀⡼⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⣤⣤⣤⣴⣟⠁
July 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing