[Copypasta] Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos create Biff Gatezos

Rub dicks together until cum, then swirl the cum into a frothy mix and inject frothy cum mixture into various surrogate mothers who are on fertility drugs, creating a high chance for twins, triplets, quintuplets, etc. Randomly transplant hearts and other organs between all babies to ensure no baby is 100% descendant of either Bill or Jeff. Let babies fight to the death until only one is left. He shall be named Biff Gatezos, overlord of Microzon. Using the combined financial prowess of his fathers, he shall be trained and upgraded to become superhuman in all aspects imaginable. There will never be another Biff Gatezos because Biff Gatezos is eternal. South-Korean baby foreskins will be used to ensure he never ages and therefore never dies. All the gods that have ever been will come down from their heavenly thrones to challenge Biff Gatezos but Biff Gatezos only need drop his trousers and reveal his mighty p***s to strike fear in the hearts of the gods and Satan himself. With a single swing of his mighty staff, Biff Gatezos will catapult the gods out of the universe and claim his rightful throne as Eternal God of Everything. Hope this clears things up.
May 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Math is "mental abuse to humans"

twitchquotes: You know how some people say that math is “mental abuse to humans”? Well, lemme tell you one thing: “Math” is an abbreviation for “mathematics”, so you’re only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for “except mostly at truly intelligently cool students”! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, you’re not truly intelligent or cool! You’re dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Don’t forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

TSM aka "Truly Somewhat Mediocre"

TSM aka "Truly Somewhat Mediocre" is a North American team that consistently underperforms in all international tournaments. It is specifically known for having a weak early, mid, and late-game.
February 2022

League of Legends

This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors

twitchquotes: ******ATTENTION ***** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) This chat is now under the sole proprietorship of Sebastian "Forsen" Fors. Please type forsen W (no space), into your chat box to verify yourself as a follower of Forsen. Those who do not verify themselves and are caught posting in this chat will be persecuted to the fullest extent of the law ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°).
twitch chat
March 2015
Trump

I hope Zoe wins but in Spanish

twitchquotes: Espero que gane Zoe xD. Soy main de Zoe y es tan tan divertida!! Me encanta trolear con su burbuja, y sus diálogos son tan monos como cuando canta sobre tarta de chocolate LOL! Es super random pero también mas lista de lo que parece, justo como yo xD
twitch chat
October 2020

League of Legends

Message deleted: memes too dank

twitchquotes: <message deleted: memes too dank>
twitch chat
August 2015
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing