[Copypasta] Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos create Biff Gatezos

Rub dicks together until cum, then swirl the cum into a frothy mix and inject frothy cum mixture into various surrogate mothers who are on fertility drugs, creating a high chance for twins, triplets, quintuplets, etc. Randomly transplant hearts and other organs between all babies to ensure no baby is 100% descendant of either Bill or Jeff. Let babies fight to the death until only one is left. He shall be named Biff Gatezos, overlord of Microzon. Using the combined financial prowess of his fathers, he shall be trained and upgraded to become superhuman in all aspects imaginable. There will never be another Biff Gatezos because Biff Gatezos is eternal. South-Korean baby foreskins will be used to ensure he never ages and therefore never dies. All the gods that have ever been will come down from their heavenly thrones to challenge Biff Gatezos but Biff Gatezos only need drop his trousers and reveal his mighty p***s to strike fear in the hearts of the gods and Satan himself. With a single swing of his mighty staff, Biff Gatezos will catapult the gods out of the universe and claim his rightful throne as Eternal God of Everything. Hope this clears things up.
May 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Spam so I may stay warm

twitchquotes: Hello chat. My home is very cold and I do not know if I will make it through the night. Whenever the chat spams, my old laptop heats up very quickly. It is the only thing keeping me alive. Please chat, spam as much as possible so I may stay warm and survive the frigid night.
twitch chat
June 2019

forsenCD Dream cheated

twitchquotes: forsenCD YOU MAY SAY THAT IM A DREAMER forsenCD BUT IM NOT THE ONLY ONE forsenCD I HOPE SOMEDAY YOU'LL JOIN US forsenCD AND THE WORLD WILL BE AS ONE forsenCD
twitch chat
December 2020
Forsen

Don't use the "F word" on the trade floor

Just heard an employee use the “F word” on the trade floor, and immediately fired them. Maybe other funds will tolerate that kind of language, but don’t you dare talk about Fundamentals here.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

DVD logo

⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⢹⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣇⠀⣠⣿⣿⠟⣽⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠃⢹⣿⣿⣶⣿⡿⠋⢰⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣠⣼⣿⣿⠏ ⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣸⣟⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣠⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣻⡟⣻⣿⢻⣿⡟⣛⢻⣿⡟⣛⣿⡿⣛⣛⢻⣿⣿⣶⣦⣄⡀⠀ ⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠷⣼⣿⣿⣼⣿⣧⣭⣼⣿⣧⣭⣿⣿⣬⡭⠾⠿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠀
January 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing