[Copypasta] mods will time you out from the chat faster than TSM's 0-6 any% airport speedrun

twitchquotes: Hi guys, please be careful - if you keep writing the same message, mods will time you out from the chat faster than TSM's 0-6 any% airport speedrun last year at World's. This is your last warning. I am a Twitch moderator.
twitch chat
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth

According to my scientific studies, Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. I am being 100 percent serious when I say this. This shouldn't even be an unpopular opinion, people just don't think about what the word "difficult" actually means. Peeing with a boner is more difficult than giving birth. Giving birth is definitely more painful, but pain by itself does not make something difficult. For example, putting my hand in a fire is not difficult, but it would hurt a lot. In order for something to be difficult, there has to be some chance of failure due to lack of skill, practice, or technique. Peeing with a boner often requires creative problem solving skills, especially in small spaces. There is no creative problem solving aspect of giving birth. Additionally, the way humans have evolved for these two actions supports my point. Giving birth is a natural process, which humans have evolved to be able to do. The female body is literally designed so that it can give birth with the lowest possible chance of error. The only real error that can happen is a miscarriage, which is also a natural occurrence, not a failure that occurs due to a lack of skill in giving birth. The male body, on the other hand, has evolved specifically so that peeing with a boner is very difficult. The only purpose for having a boner is to impregnate a woman, so the male body evolved to prevent urination during sex. On top of the difficulty in simply getting the pee to flow, there's the issue of actually positioning yourself so that the boner is pointing into the toilet bowl (urinals are much easier, but not always an option). In the past, I have had to give up and wait until my boner goes away because it was simply too difficult to actually pee in the toilet. There has never been a case where a woman has tried to give birth after being pregnant for nine months, not been able to do it, and said "fuck it" and waited 3 more months to try again because it would be easier the second try. Giving birth happens, every single time, because it's a natural process - peeing with a boner is the opposite.
May 2021

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you πŸ‘‰πŸΏ ever 😠 had a dreams πŸ˜΄πŸ’­- thats βœ”- that you πŸ‘‰πŸ»πŸ‘€ uhm 😀 you πŸ‘ˆ had you πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ˆ could- you πŸ‘ˆ do what you πŸ‘‰ want 😍- you πŸ‘ˆ could do- so you πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘¦- you πŸ‘ˆ do- you πŸ‘ˆ could do you πŸ€–πŸ‘ˆ- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ wan πŸ”‘- you πŸ‘ΈπŸ‘‰ want πŸ˜‹ him πŸ‘΄ to do so much πŸ”₯ that you πŸ‘‰ could do anything πŸ’°?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with you? I simply can’t fucking believe that you would make such an idiotic decision. You’re a disgusting little crawly lobotomite and you deserve to perish in a dark deep abyss where you belong. I’ve gone ahead and removed one reddit upvote from your account by β€œdownvoting” this comment. I hope you rethink your actions in the future. Fuck you.
August 2021

Am I The Asshole?

WE ARE ALL FRIENDS IN TWITCH CHAT

twitchquotes: <3 NA THIS <3 EU THAT <3 WE ARE ALL FRIENDS <3 IN TWITCH CHAT! <3
twitch chat
August 2018

EU vs NA

Trick2g, my son keeps saying lata and the gates

twitchquotes: Hello, is this "@Trick2g "? My son just got back from elementary school and keeps saying "lata" this and "the gates" that. He even told me how he wants to be a professional gate opener to all the asian hunnies. Please no Kapparino pastarino
twitch chat
September 2014
Trick2g
Text-to-Speech Playing